SOFT BUN || markhyuck

22.

The puddle of blood increased in size with every passing second. I breathed heavily never giving a fuck about the fact that what had I just done. I heard a cuss from the back when someone came running. 'What have you done, you fool,' I turned a bit, finding Jeno standing in the door way with Jisung standing next to him, shocked expression painted on their faces.

'It's not my fault that he brought someone like me here, I don't give two shits about anyone here but using someone extends the limit,'

'That does not mean you fucking murder someone,' he greeted through his teeth as he walked to me grabbing me by my collar.'Why? It shouldn't be a big deal considering you already slaughter kids and feed them to the dogs. Might as well add one more to the pantry,'

'I don't do such things,' he let go.

'Yeah, well, you're not doing something about it either,' I stopped in spot when he began our conversation further that should've stopped at the previous sentence from my mouth. 'Cause now, I was fucking pissed to the limits.

'Don't think that just because you weren't raised in such an environment, you're pure- I know, I know your intentions and if I see even little hint of weird behavior from you, might I remind you, I will deal with it all myself,'

I skipped a step and punched him in the face hard. Not expecting something, he stumbled back and fell on his back. Hitting his head in the end. Jaemin got up and leaned over him, blocking my next blow. Jisung hugged my left leg crying. Begging me not to do something else.

'Stop.... please... don't do something more than whats already done,' Jaemin spoke further looking at me, I looked away- I couldn't look at him 'We need to get rid of this guy before someone else sees... and... someone needs to clean this mess up too,'

Jisung and Jaemin stayed behind cleaning the blood. I never even once in my life thought that there will come a time when I would have to drag a god damn body behind me in this forest of a garden.

By now, there was no point on complaining about being here. I was already here for almost half a month and all I need to focus now was to get the hell out of here, after I'm doing digging this god damn hole in the ground. Jeno stood watch and while I was doing the hard... and sweaty part.

In the end, we both dropped the body and covered it up- this time the moron helped.

I had to get rid of my clothes now too, considering the blood patches in a few places. The walk back inside felt a little too long. I just wanted to go to sleep now. I was too damn tired to keep myself awake any longer. But the thing with all this was that, I left a part of me back there. Next to the unwanted grave of Kim.

If I was to actually think about this whole 'plan', I realized something. Even though I was here to save someones life, I wasn't the hero in this story. I was meant to be the villain when needed. I was merely a worker, orphan, who these people needed at times like these to keep their hands clean. No one would mourn when I would be gone. These things would dance and sing on my grave if they could. But then in the end, who knows they actually might.

I was lonely.

I've known that all this time, but it hurt to actually admit to it. These four walls felt more close sometimes then anything ever could. I clenched the dirty laundry in my hands to chest as I actually accepted the fact that I really was..

'I'm lonely,' I whispered, hoping someone might actually listen and maybe just lie for a few minutes to give my heart peace that I'm not.

I wondered if I was the bad person in every persons lives that I've met, or was it just mine?

I don't consider myself a bad person, but then I wasn't a good person either. When I say I need to just go to bed at the end of the day, I mostly mean crawling to make it to bed at the end of the day when everything feels too heavy. I say the end of the day, but it's mostly the beginning. I'm only a good person, except for when I'm not.

I don't mean what I say except for when I do.

I lay back down. My back touching the cold surface through the material of the blooded shirt. Moving my arm over my face. I try to drift off to dream land, I was too tired to stay in the real world.

For today, I had committed the second greatest sin in my life:

Firstly Rape and now,

Murder.