Songs for this chapter- Nina: Ed Sheeran, Spaces: One Direction
Chapter 30:
"Just a decaf please." I say as my waitress comes to my table.
I stormed out of the studio after Niall's little announcement and ran to the nearest place I could find to clear my head. At first I felt angry, but that passed the moment I was hit with the freezing winter air. Then I guess I walked along the snow lined street until I reached this cute little restaurant.
I'm not mad anymore because I realized I have nobody to be upset with. This wasn't any of the boys' fault, its just a part of their job. I knew it was going to happen sooner or later, I was just banking on it being the later.
While I wait for something to happen, I'm not quite sure what though, I pull out my pad of paper and do what I know best when faced with a dilemma. I write.
I write about what I'm feeling even though I couldn't describe it out loud even if you paid me to. I guess I feel anxious about Niall being away from me while I'm pregnant with his child, I'm scared that he won't even want to help me raise it, and even if he does I'm absolutely petrified about the mere thought of nurturing another human being when I can barely stand by myself yet. And to top it all of I feel guilty that Niall doesn't even know he has to deal with all of this yet. How am I going to tell him now? How am I going to ruin his future over this?
I can't tell him yet, I just couldn't bear it. I don't want him to have to choose between me and his career. Partially for his sake, but mostly for mine. I have a bad feeling he would pick the tour.
My phone wakes me from my daze and I slide my finger across the screen before even reading the caller ID.
"Why did you just run off like that?" Nialls voice sounds the moment I answer. At least he doesn't sound angry, more confused if anything.
I sigh and then let out a feeble, "I don't know."
"Well where are you?" He questions and I can hear his car starting over the line. I don't reply, instead I bite my lip and try not to breath into the receiver. I'm not sure if I'm ready for this conversation.
"Rosie?" He pleads when I stay silent.
"Some diner down the street. Lloyd's, I believe." I give in and tell him.
"I'll be there in five...I love you." He says and I hang up the phone.
I stir the small silver spoon in my coffee mug, staring at the wisps of heat that leave the brown surface, until I hear the door ring, signaling someone entered the shop. Niall sits down across from me but I still don't look up at him.
"You look beautiful." He compliments me to break a solid minute of silence.
"When are you leaving?" I reply immediately in an icy tone.
"When you decide to come with me." He says and I finally look up at him as a small smile crosses his lips. He reaches over to place one of his hands over mine on top of the table.
"Do you not trust me?" I ask in a relaxed tone so I don't seem as angry as I am.
"No, of course I do babe. It isn't about trust, I'd just miss you too much. Come on, we'll get to see the world together...I thought you'd be happy." He wonders why I'm acting so strange. Honestly I'm just trying not to explode on his thick skull.
"If it isn't a trust issue then its a respect issue." I state, removing my hand from under his and crossing it over my lap. I sit up straight and set my jaw in an attempt to keep my cool.
"Rosie...don't make this a big thing." He sighs, rubbing his temples with his pointer fingers.
"A thing?" I question in a threatening tone. He better not call me a drama queen or I swear I will snap.
