Country Humans x Reader Oneshots

🇷🇺 Cooler Than Me

Russia x cool fem reader

Request from Quotev.

Haha yikes, sorry for not updating in like a month. Life got busy with the addition of a dog and school got tricky. But here's a chapter finally! Since I have another half-completed draft, I'll try to get that one published this weekend to make up for my absence. Hopefully, after that, I can get back into a regular schedule again.

I think this one is kinda cute, if a bit rushed in terms of quality and shorter in length. Not entirely certain what was meant by "cool" necessarily, so I really hope you like what I did with it.

Word Count: 1184

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Across the room, Japan sat with a clipboard and empty glasses frames. As she looked over a blank notebook paper, she made thoughtful expressions. With a cat-themed pen, she scribbled down some notes. Once you were sure she lost all focus, judging by the empty look in her eyes, you started to speak up.

"Uh-"

"Why don't you start from the beginning of your conflict with Russia," Japan said.

Oh, so that's what this whole therapist shtick is about. All you did was offhandedly mention his odd behavior. This whole elaborate act seems a tad unnecessary.

"I wouldn't really call it a conflict, more just him being an asshole," you said, Japan urged for you to continue, "Although I suppose it is kinda recent."

Ever since you started hanging out with America, Russia has pretty much disowned you. Although, what he thought never mattered to you, every other was student wrapped around your finger. That brings us back to why Japan cares so much about a little teasing here or there.

"Listen, I understand rejection can be hard for you, but that's why I'm here to work you through it," Japan said as she made reassuring eye contact.

Playing along with whatever childish fantasy is the easiest way out of this kind of encounter. You could still remember when Japan joined the "in-group" after America put her in her place. Before that point, she was a super isolated introvert that got into fights with others often. However, everyone's middle school years tend to be very awkward. It was actually those reasons that caused you to hang out with her more than the others, you could relate.

You haven't been a part of the cool kids for very long, only getting the invite this school year. Time spent before that was lonely, taking a cold approach to the outside world. On occasion, you would chill with Russia and his harem of kids he bullies. He never gave you much attention and you never got bothered by others, a functioning system.

Then you got noticed by America-senpai who generously "saved" you from the clutches of communism and forced you to join the NATO club instead. From there France gave you a makeover and you became recognized as the bad bitch you were. Leather jacket, shades, combat boots, the whole works. Kids would cower away as you strut down the hall with America. Not going to lie, it sorta felt like really good. It doesn't get much better after everyone respects you.

Well, everyone except for Russia. To him, this whole act was nothing more than a pathetic attempt to be accepted by others. A cute little roleplay in a fantasy you would soon wake up from. It wouldn't be much time before you came crawling back to him. Then, he would mock you for a bit before things returned back to the status quote.

After a few months, this seemed to not be the case. In fact, you even looked happy with those western bastards. No way in hell Russia was going to let this continue. Instead of his previous strategy, he turned his bullying crosshairs towards your direction. You mentioned this during lunch one day, which excited Japan for some godforsaken reason. Next thing you know you're sitting in an empty counseling office getting probed on your personal life.

"What's the point in this exactly? Why does anything of this mean so much to you?" You asked, trying to change the subject.

"Russia has a big, fat crush on you and it's killing me!" Japan jumped up and stomped her foot.

"Are you trying to suggest he constantly picks on me because he likes me? Doesn't that kind of perpetuate an outdated stereotype of 'boys will be boys' and that I, a girl, should put up with it?"

"No, I'm suggesting he's jealous that you spend so much time with America, his rival. Also, North may or may not have let it slip that Russia wanted to ask you on a date, but you didn't hear that from me," Japan stood with a wink and started for the door, "This seems to have been a rather successful appointment, I believe we've made a breakthrough."

Giggling, Japan exited the room, leaving you alone to reflect on what she said. There were still 20 minutes left of lunch, more than enough time to confront Russia yourself.

The cafeteria was loud as always, filled with the chatter of your fellow peers. Walking past your table, you saw Japan giving you a thumbs up, earning a glare from you. You didn't stop walking until you reached Russia's table, hitting you with a feeling of nostalgia. Looking back over to your table, you caught America's eye, his brow raised. At that moment you reflected briefly on whether this was a good idea. Someone clearing their throat brought you back to reality.

"Is there something you want to say to me?" Russia asked, a smug grin plastered on his stupid face.

"Yeah, what the fuk is up with you lately?"

"Me? I just think it's adorable how hard you're trying to feel cool. You may have everyone else fooled, but I can see right through your pathetic little act-" before Russia could finish his rant he got interrupted.

"Hey Y/N! What do you think you're doing over there, talking to that filthy Commie?" America shouted across the room.

"They're in love with each other! There's going to be a beautiful wedding, everyone is invited so there's a lot of fighting at the reception. Oh, but I bet Y/N would look so pretty in a dress, France could even design it." Japan continued to ramble on, but at that point, you stopped listening.

Russia's expression showed disgust, but his eyes betrayed shame. North Korea shifted uncomfortably in his seat from the flame of Russia's death glare. You stood there awkwardly, trying to process all the commotion happening about. Once you remembered the task at hand, you cleared your throat, catching Russia's attention.

"So, wanna go out sometime? I'm free this Friday, we can meet up at the skating rink around 6," you said.

"Sure, why not," Russia said, acting as if he wasn't completely taken aback.

"I guess it's a date, see you then," you said, blowing him a kiss and winking as you walk away.

Even though you couldn't see Russia's face, you could make a pretty good guess knowing that egotistical bastard. Probably already going off and bragging, even though everybody at the table witnessed the event. However, you have bigger fish to fry at the moment. A gigantic, oil-obsessed fish.

It's likely America is going to nuke you for this, perhaps even literally. At the very least you'll be kicked out of the cool club, if not shunned for the rest of your high school years. That doesn't really matter though. While being loved by a lot of strangers is pretty cool, it would never come close to the feeling of a real human connection. Plus, you were getting tired of hanging out with a bunch of wannabes anyway.