Past haunting

Chapter 4

It was 1am Dean still wasn't home yet but I didn't stress it cause I was so use to him coming home late. The first time he came come late I flipped out on him.

"Where were you?" I yelled at 4am and he just walked pasted like nothing.

"You're not gonna say anything." I continued pissed off

"Back off I'm not in the mood. Let me rest." Dean said about to lay down on the couch.

"No do you see what time it is? No call, text no nothing!" I yelled in his face

"I said leave me alone!" Dean said getting comfortable in the couch.

I remember that night I couldn't sleep that's the day I realized he doesn't care about me. This happened so many times after that too.

But no matter what he always comes back. I just hoped he wasn't in trouble. When the time hit 3:30am I heard the front door open and I automatically knew it was no other than my husband. I went down to check him out and when he saw me he threw himself on me.

"Seth I missed you." Dean said hugging me. I didn't say anything instead I guided him upstairs to the bedroom. On the way up he kept telling me how much he's missed me.

"Baby lets do something. Come on I miss you and I'm craving you so badly right now." Dean said pulling me on top of him. Thing is I didn't want to do anything tonight I was upset. He comes late and expects me to be okay with me all the time I'm sick of it. I'm not sick of him I'm sick of his actions. I climbed off of him and refused to for full his needs.

"You know how much people I could've slept with tonight? Who know maybe next time I go to the bar I will. Unless you want me for yourself. Come prove it baby." Dean said manipulating me.

I debate what to do but I ended up getting undressed for him. Letting his alcohol mouth kisses me all over before he positioned me on all fours. He didn't use lube, protective or anything so it hurt for a few seconds but my body adjusted to it. He grabbed my hips and went deeply in me while he was doing that I just closed my eyes thought about everything thats happened.

Weeks later

Weeks passed and Dean didn't get any better. I insisted on him stop drinking and going to rehab AA. Nothing ever works and I'm starting to think it never will. I was shook out of my thoughts when the patients heart rate flatlined. Everyone rushed to save him but we failed. I've worked here many many countless shifts but I never experienced a death. It sanded me, I even went home sad. While Dean was singing  his ass off he noticed my upset face. He went to me grabbing me forcing me to dance with him but I wasn't having it. I tried pulling away from him but instead he pulled me in closer by grabbing my wrist forcing me to face him then proceed to hit me in the face.

"You go when I say to go." Dean said to in my ear then proceed to kiss my neck. My face had tears in them

"Dean please let me go. You're drunk you're not going to remember this. You were never like this... think about all the times you never abused me and how fun we were." I said crying even harder Dean stopped what he was doing and didn't say anything after that. He just walked out of the house.

After that I cried my eyes out not wanting to do anything. I was super emotional and I really didn't know why. After a few more minutes I wiped my face and made Dean's favorite dinner. I just wanted to make things right knowing he would be back but he didn't come home for hours and I had to sleep cause of an early shift tomorrow.

But I went to bed happily cause Dean walked out. Hear me out but after I told him to think about a time where he didn't abuse me and when we were happy he stopped and left. So he felt sad about what he was doing to me. I know deep down he's still there I just don't know how to get him to he's full potential. But I will... hopefully.

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