Chapter Ten: *TRIGGER WARNING*
Tony exited the bedroom, excited to see Steve. He held the four notecards in his hands tightly, with a grin that was mixed with excitement.
He was almost to the stairs when he ran into Wanda, "Oh, s'cuse me."
"Hey," Wanda stopped him, "What's that?"
"Oh, it's just my script," Tony shrugged, hiding his pride for the small paragraphs. He handed them to her, curing her curiosity.
She scanned through the cards, her expression slowly hardening, "Is this for Steve?"
"Yeah, actually," Tony smiled.
"You can't tell him this," Wanda placed the cards back into his hands.
"Why not?" he furrowed his eyebrows.
"Because it's wrong. It won't work. Being gay is a sin," Wanda stated, "And Steve's Christian. You'll just get hurt."
"Oh," Tony frowned slightly, "But I really like him, and I think he might actually like me back. I'm going to-,"
"No, Tony," Wanda cut him off, genuinely concerned for the man, "Can't you see? Steve doesn't like you, you're just not his type. You're going to get hurt, I won't let you."
"Uhh, have you seen Peggy? Brown hair, brown eyes," Tony listed, "That's kinda me."
"No, Tony!" Wanda huffed, not wanting to see Tony any worse than he already was. She reached her hand out gently, allowing the red to seep out.
"No! Don't-," Tony was cut off by her power slipping him unconscious.
"It's for the best," Wanda whispered, catching him and gently helping him to Steve's bed, which wasn't far, "You have to see what you're doing is wrong. I don't want to see you hurt."
~~~~~
"Wait, are you serious?" Steve raised his eyebrow.
"Uhm, yeah, I kinda was," Tony replied awkwardly, not expecting this response.
"That's disgusting! Gay? Really? People go to hell for that!" Steve raised his voice, making Tony flinch back.
"But-,"
"And even if I were a sinner, I wouldn't date you!" Steve sneered, "I mean, no offense, but have you looked in a mirror? Not only that, but you do know you're kinda pathetic, right? Because for someone so useless, you're quite full of yourself and selfish. I see what you're dad meant."
"Don't talk about my dad!" Tony yelled, ignoring the tears filling his eyes.
"Oh come on," Steve rolled his eyes, "Be honest, you never amounted to anything. You just inherited money."
"How could...how could you say that?!" Tony's voice boomed, choked with emotion, "I-I thought we were friends! I thought....I thought you loved me!"
"What? Who could ever love you? You're a lame excuse of an avenger...of
a human being really," Steve eyed him in pity, Tony's heart breaking with every word."On the bright side, you're good bait," Steve shrugged, "Alveus seems to like the screw ups."
Tony finally let a small sob escape his mouth, "What did I ever do to you?"
"The better question is, what didn't you do?" Steve corrected, "Do this world a favor, and just leave, eh?"
"Leave?" Tony asked, "Where?!"
"Leave," Steve shrugged, "Die. It's not like it makes much of a difference, hm? Don't act like you don't deserve it, even Alveus knew you didn't deserve to live."
And Tony didn't know what hurt more. The fact that he believed it all to be true, of that Steve believed it all to be true.
~~~~~
Tony's eyes shot open as his heart raced. He looked around quickly, finding himself in Steve's bedroom.
"It was fake," Tony muttered to himself as he rubbed his eyes, "S' not real."
But despite his words, he felt himself not quite feeling up to asking Steve just yet. Parts of it were true,
Steve was a Christian.
Being gay was a sin.
"No, no," Tony clutched his head, trying to stop the flood of thoughts, "It's not true."
He walked into the bathroom, locking the door, and gripped the counter until his knuckles were white. He was so utterly disgusted.
"This is what she wants," Tony mumbled. He stood up to leave, but caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror when he turned. And for a moment, he didn't recognize the man in the mirror.
This one made his stomach twist. He was destruction. Almost everywhere he went, disaster followed. Dead parents, friends, family. He was selfish and cruel. Weak and pathetic. Unlovable.
"You're a monster," Tony sneered at his reflection. Certainly Steve deserves better. Anyone deserves better.
"And I hate you," Tony continued as his anger grew like a wildfire. The whole tower seemed to go quiet as Tony punched the mirror, "I hate you!"
He continued to go swing after swing, the crack widening with every blow, "I hate you! I hate you! I hate you...you worthless piece of shit! You never should have been born!"
The mirror shattered, and Tony's hands went straight to his head, "You were a mistake! A screw-up!"
"You don't-," Tony fell to his knees, "You don't deserve to live!"
He gripped a medium sized piece of glass, "You deserve to suffer! To be in pain! You-,"
"Tony? Who are you talking to?" Steve pressed his ear to the door, jiggling the doorknob.
"You ruined everything!" Tony lifted the glass to his wrist, "I-I hate you!"
"Tony?!" Steve's heart rate quickened, "Tony, open the door!"
He banged on the door, but the other side was silent. He prepared for the worst as he rammed the door down with his shoulder. Upon entering, his heart dropped to his stomach.
"Oh no, no," Steve moved some of the glass out of the way as he ran to Tony's side. His eyes were unfocused, and he didn't acknowledge Steve at all.
"Oh my god," Steve tried not to be overwhelmed at the river of blood. He took his jacket off and quickly wrapped it around the wounds, "BRUCE!"
"Come on," Steve struggled to pick Tony up and keep the pressure on the wounds. Tony was very much conscious and aware of his surroundings, but he couldn't find it within himself to move an inch. He couldn't find it within himself to do anything at all.
YOU ARE READING
What Are the Odds? (Stony Au)
Fanfiction"He hates me," Steve stated bluntly. "Hate's a strong word, Cap," Clint reassured his old friend, "I'm sure he doesn't hate you." "I hate him." "Huh," Steve wondered out loud, "What are the odds?"