The Loneliest Stars

Chapter 13

A massive, huge, gigantic THANK YOU to everyone that has been reading and commenting and voting. It honestly makes the writing process feel so much fun and less solitary.

There's a trigger warning for this chapter; suicide and mild suicide ideation about three quarters of the way down.

"Bitch, I don't talk to you for a couple of days and you got yourself into a relationship?" Lima squealed when she finally appeared on the radar. "That's so on-brand for you, Natty."

Natalia sighed. "It's not a relationship, it's more like a...situationship," She sighed, massaging her forehead. "I dunno, I need to figure it out."

"Nat, God love you, but you overthink things. Just go with the flow." Lima advised.

"Okay. I will. He's just so vague and mysterious. I hate that!"

"Yes, you're a scientist, you like things to be black and white blah blah blah..." Lima chortled at her own pun. "We know, okay? But like, chill. Can you do that?"

"I guess. Anyway, 'nuff about me. What's happening with you?"

"You remember, Wadha right?"

"Yes, I do. Go on." Lima was referring to their Emirati friend, a kooky girl they had met in the toilets of the W hotel on a random night out and she had become a transient member of their friendship circle for a while.

"I designed a dress for her, which she wore to her family's Eid majlis, and now her cousin - who happens to be marrying a prince from Ras Al Khaimah, wants me to design her wedding dress. Me."

"Wow, Lima!" Natalia exclaimed, excitement making her voice loud and rushed. "That's major. This could be it."

"I know, this could be my big break, you know?"

"Hey, Lima. Don't do that. You got this."

"Thanks," She said, her confidence returning. "Hey, I was thinking that I need some inspiration and I thought I might need a change of scenery. Do you think I can visit for winter break?"

"Are you shitting me? As if you ever have to ask! Of course, you can."

"Cool, I'll let you know when I book my ticket. Also, I broke up with Mo."

"What? Lima..."

"Sorry, I have to dash. I've got my class coming in now." She disappeared with an abrupt dash, frustrating Natalia to no end.

She must be okay and dealing with it, Natalia rationalised, otherwise she would have called her earlier to talk through it. Natalia felt a little bit guilty, she had been so absorbed in her own life she hadn't checked in with Lima as much as she could have. Natalia made a note to be more present and to find ways to connect with Lima outside of phone calls.

She was so bad with social media apps, she hadn't even logged on to her Instagram since she had been in Texas. Snapchat? Forget it. She had deleted her LinkedIn and Facebook after an ex had stalked her to the school she was working at and refused to leave until they got back together.

Natalia changed into her pyjamas, her thoughts whirling with the events of the last couple of days. She groaned when she remembered to flick the light off before she took her top off. She didn't want to be giving out anymore unwitting shows. She had been absolutely horrified when Gabe had casually informed her, as if he was commenting on the weather that he'd seen her un-dress.

She was self-conscious about her body and underdressing in front of others, especially men. It had always given her anxiety, unfounded or not. The fact that he had stuck around after seeing her gave her an odd sense of comfort, that she could not unpack right now, not without the aid of a therapist and copious amounts of wine.