V a p o r ▶ J. HALE (COMPLETED.)

15.

V a p o r.

Some call it cursed, blinded or even bewitched— I call it love.

Which, to some extent, might be close to the same. Being vulnerably close to another being, close enough that you might become one, entering your soul, coursing through your body, affecting your whole day, month, year or life. It's an energy, positive or negative, that brings us to life. It's an act, that creates life itself.

Mom would always say, "Call it faith, science, or humanity,— the answer always stays the same. Love."

Growing up with a hippie of a mother, and little to none discipline, it was easy to roll my eyes and ignore everything that came out of her mouth.

It was easy because I didn't know better.

She'd shake her finger at me, and then proceed to laugh. "You can ignore me all you want, Dema. But, love will always be the answer."

Little did I know, she was actually onto something.

The feeling of love— infatuation— reduces cortisol, the stress hormone, which alters brain structure for the better. If everyone loved right, in this messed-up world we call home, there would be less problems to be concerned about.

As it turns out, love really might be the answer to almost everything. At least, scientifically speaking, it might be.

When I was younger, I'd daydream about it. About love being the anchor to our existence, to our soul. I'd use to think that whenever our lives ended, our ghost-like souls would still be tied to our dimension— tied to our loved ones.

Tied to the physical world by love.

Sounds silly now, but back then I used to dream about being swept away by a charming man, getting married, having children, and growing old by his side.

Back then, when normal was still an option.

Sometimes, I like to think about how my life would've turned out if I had never moved to Forks. If I had never gotten the curse or met Bella. If I had never met Jasper Hale.

Would I have been complete? Would I have been happy?

Of course, back then I didn't know magic existed. I didn't know what sacrifice was, or what it meant. I didn't know what having real friends felt like. I didn't know how to love.

I still don't know how to love, but that hasn't stopped me from doing so.

That hasn't stopped me from loving Jasper Hale.

And I have a feeling it still won't stop me from doing it for the rest of eternity.

Because, maybe normal is not an option anymore, but eternity is. Forever and always, is an option. And it might be the only one I have at the moment, but spending the rest of my days, side by side with a gloomy-looking vampire— which I happen to be in love with— sounds like a hell of a good time— if you ask me.

At the end of the day, I'll never know how my life would've turned out if I had turned out 'normal'. But, if I'm being honest here, I don't think I even want to know.

Because the answer always stays the same— I choose eternity with him.

Even if the journey here has been recklessly tiring, dysfunctional, terrifying, dangerous, and borderline comedic— I'd go through it a thousand times if it meant I'd still end up by his side. Cracking jokes at his expense, enjoying our silent dates, and his overly-pessimistic attitude over life.