If the World Could Understand

Third.

 

   I've gotten to a point where I can't cry anymore. I've built a wall around myself. All my pain is stored away so I can put on a happy persona. But is that really good for me? Is it good to block everything out? No, it's not. Because when the time comes that the pain is triggered, it breaks down the walls that I've built. I can't hide from it forever. I can't let it eat me up; but that's what I'm doing.
When I'm with my friends, I'm happy. But am I really? I sit there letting my thoughts devour me. All these emotions running through my head. Am I really happy? I just wish the world could understand.
The emotions swallow me whole. I'm drowning in sorrow, trying my best to swim out; but I'm stuck. I'm stuck and I can't move. I open my eyes and look at the reality surrounding me. I have to face my pain, but how? I can't, and I never will be able to. I'm alone in this fight and all I can do is drown or try to swim away.