My Masked Assassin

Chapter Eight: Short Dicks

2 years later

"Okay seriously, I mean it!" I say forcefully in delight.

"I'll believe it when I see it" Tom snorts, stuffing his face with a pastry.

"You want to stand in the room and watch me have sex?"

"Not really...maybe" he grins.

"You are such a psycho" I giggled.

"You say he was amazing in bed, yet his pecker isn't tall enough to ride the big kids ride" Tom says, "I find that impossible to believe."

"It isn't the size, you jackass, it's what you do with it" I wave my small tea spoon in his direction.

"Well I wouldn't know," he continues cockily, "Because I have both the size and the skills"

"Liiiiiier!!" I holler and taunt him.

"Don't make me whip it out, I swear I will. Right here, right now" he threatened.

"Barf mania!" I chuckle inching back in my seat and looking repulsed.

We were sitting outside a popular café in mid afternoon. I hadn't seen Tom for the past 3 days so we decided to catch up here because I had a popular event to get to this evening.

I'd woken up this morning in the alcove of my living room under the window. I often times sit there looking up at the stars and forget to go back to my bedroom and just fall asleep there.

I woke up very late today with little time to even get ready to come meet Tom. I'd rushed through my apartment trying to clean myself enough so my hygiene could reach a level that'll be presentable to other human beings.

The weather was so unbelievably hot it could roast balls! Which didn't make sense cause I was sipping hot tea.

"So you like this actor guy enough to go out with him twice?" Tom asked.

The event tonight was a premier of famed actor Rohilieo Antonio's first music video. He'd wanted to branch out into music and expand his career into the music industry, the whole town was delighted that he'd picked our degenerate little corner of the city to premiere his video.

He'd begged me to appear in his music video because he felt I'd add an element of danger and a sense of mystery. I rejected him. After months and months of begging I agreed to appear in a 5 second cameo. They'd shot my scene just yesterday.

And we'd hooked up last night.

To Tom's evident disapproval, "I won't say I like him, particularly" I say. "He's just interesting to have around"

"You talk about him like he's a puppy" Tom scoffed. "Besides, you never see a guy more than once. You just bang em and go!"

"Why are you so interested in this?" I asked.

A waitress just set down our sandwiches and gave Tom the cat eyes. This was one of the several reasons I hated being in public with Tom, girls were literally two seconds away from tossing their panties at him. Have some respect woman!

It wouldn't bother me as much if it was just him, but I also get my fair share of gogo eyed male idiots approach us in public. I guess that's what happens when two incredibly gorgeous people hang out, we oozed so much sex appeal we should practically just be giant magnets.

"Because I really just don't trust this dude," Tom finally spites out. "And don't even think of saying I'm jealous, I will kill you!"

"I know you're not" I drone, then I grunt. "You kill me? I'd like to see that" I take a huge bite of the sandwich.

As I chewed I sized him up.

Tom looked unbelievably different from the first time I saw him. Two years ago if anyone had told me Tom could look like this...I'd cut off their left pinkie just to teach them a lesson about lying.

Back then I assumed Tom must've been handsome but daaaaaamn! Was I understating things! I could go on and on about this attributes, qualities and features but I didn't want to sound like I liked him or anything.

After the whole robbery incident Tom pleaded Temporary Insanity to the court and instead of jail time he got sentenced 8 months in a mental institution. If it wasn't for Sally's report he'd have been thrown in an asylum to rot.

After the 8 months the court still decreed and insisted he stay under close surveillance for four months, so I offered he stay at my place.

Tom was by far the most interesting person to live with, all the stories he gave me about the institution were straight up legendary. And he was also a whizz in the kitchen. I suppose I was a decent cook, but on my lazy days I was just about able to open a pack of skittles.

"Just be careful" Tom advised.

"When have I never?"

"Every day of your life"

I scrawl at him.

"You're the same person who went to fight an arsonist at a gas station with a missile launcher," he says flatly, "How did that scenario even gown down in your head!?"

"You promised never to bring that up," I snarl at him under my breath.

"I promise a lot of things," he shrugs, "Doesn't mean I'll keep em." He picked up another pastry and looked at it gloomily, then frowned.

"I think I'm gonna go with the silvery sparkling black dress" I say to change the topic.

"You mean the one that shows all your back and most of your front?" he eats his pastry anyway. "Good call!"

"Yeah, I'm thinking of hidings some knifes under it" I comment. "You know, just in case"

"Agreed, you can never be too careful around people with short dicks" he waves a third desert in my face.

"Enough about his dick, please!" I cried, slamming my fist on the table and making the contents jump.

I said that abit too loud, causing people to look at us skeptically. Tom laughs soundly at me as I laid my head low and tried to be none existent.

"Good luck on your date, anyway" he smirks at me,holding his iced tea glass in a toast.