DIFFERENCES

Chapter 10

Jealousy and heartache

Ezekiel

" He is my ex, Nathan is my ex baby" that word echoed in my head that makes me lost my emotions. I lost myself when she said that and I get angry too. Nathan loves her eventhough she does not love  her anymore but still  I feel envious.

I could not control myself and I punch Nathan so hard. I heard that Zyrene called my name for me to stop but I couldn't, I feel so hurt. She hugged me tightly to calmed my nerves but did not help at all instead it makes me more mad. I am not mad to her, I am mad at myself because of she is hurt to what I acted now.

I grab her and throw her to the passenger seat when we get in the parking lot. I drove off fast and she is screaming at me to slow down. I did hear it out and I let my anger consume me.  After a while she stop screaming when I saw her like she is already fainted I lost it. My anger faded like a lightning, it broke me even more. I slow down a bit and park my car in the side of the road. I cried and cried because of I feel hurt that I hurted the woman I loved the most for the second time around.

I tried to wake her up but she could not make it. I decided to take her in the hospital for her to be treated. I know that I go harsh on her and regretted it now. I was just hurt to the thought that I could not loved her just like what Nathan feels.

It pains me so much to know that Nathan and I loved and fall for the same woman again. At first, when Nathan love Andrea I give up because I know that Andrea loves him with all her heart. But Nathan is hard to her back then to make the story short, they broke and then she found Zyrene then broke up again.

This time, I won't mine go to him again not until when I am died already. I made a promise that no matter what will happen I will never let go of Zyrene and I really mean that. I don't do promises because I am afraid to broke it but now I do because of the woman I loved.

I drive the car fast again and immediately arrive in the hospital. Everyone go onto us to help me, they get a stretcher to put Zyrene in. Doctors and nurses are busy checling her vitals before they get Zyrene in the emergency.

I was just outside waiting for the doctors to came out and to report what happened. I prayed silently that she will be alright. I hated myself so much because of me Zyrene is now here in the hospital unconscious. I am to be blamed on what happened to her and I swear to God that I will not forgive myself if something bad happens to her.

I quickly stood up when the doctor who is checking on her came out. " Are the patients husband or boyfriend?" he asked me. " I am the boyfriend doc" I answered him. " The patient is now stable but I found something that might be the cause of her to faint. Let's go my office to discussed this matter because this is really serious." He seriously said and I follow him.

I silently thank God for the mercy he gave to Zyrene. But I am nervous on what will happen next. I admit that I am afraid to what could be the result and what is the serious matter tje doctor need to discussed on me.

I don't know wht will I do to myself if something is really not on the goodside. I am to be the responsible of what happen because if I do not gave in and let my patience stay longer this will not gonna be like this.

When I arrive in the doctor's office my heart beats fast and I know to myself that something is going wrong. I opened the door and sit in the vacant chair. I hide the emotion which is the fact that I am afraid.

" I will not go smooth on to you Mr. Montalban, your girlfriend has a serious illness that is why she fainted and could not get back in her own self when you tried to wake her up. Your girlfriend is suffering from a cardiovascular disease which is very dangerous to a person who have this kind of illness. It can be cured but not in here, we have no high tech medical facilities and materials. It is sad to think that we are not modernized, government is not yet fulfilling some of their promises. So I suggest that you better take her to US to have some medicine and be treated in there. I will just give some tablets for her to take and to prevent the disease to even more complicated." He said seriously. I am just in there, sitting and could not even utter a single word. My  mouth hanged open and my heart beats so fast. This is insane, oh God why did this happen to my angel. If I could just take that illness away and make it mine. I could not take it anymore, why her. This can't be, if I could just turn back time. I go out in the office light headed and go the nearest chapel. In the chapel, I am the only one who is in there. I did not know that I will go in this place again, this time I would not wish to die but I need to pray for my angel's health. My tears began to fall, the pain inside my heart grow even more. I just cry and cry then pray for mercy that angel will wake up soon so that I could take her with in the US. Why did this happen so fast?

Is this all I will get to pay all my debts to you Lord? Please not this one, I really hate to admit that I could not take this anymore. It may sounds gay but that is the truth. I am afraid to lost some again, not even when I could do something to make her stay.

After I could bear the pain, I immediately go the room where angel is. When I saw her lying in the bed unconcious, I wish that if only I could shift our position. I sit beside her amd hold her and kiss her forehead.  I am so sorry angel, if I could just that pain away from you I already do that but I can't sorry. Wake up now so that you can have a treatment and will be okay again. I promise I will do what happen before you laying on this bed sorry. I whispered silently to her.