Iris

5. A Therapist's Job is Never Done

The only sound after five minutes of complete silence in Linda Martin's office that morning was the sound of Lucifer Morningstar's ridiculously expensive Italian leather shoes hitting the floor as his leg bounced anxiously. He was leaned over on the couch, his elbows resting on his knees and his fingers interlocked and pressed against his mouth. He stared straight ahead, his wide dark brown eyes unblinking.

Though it was wearing thin, Linda sat patiently with her legs crossed and her hands clasped as she waited for Lucifer to tell her what was on his mind. She suspected it was an abnormally large combination of things that he had no experience dealing with, but helping him deal with his feelings toward these events was her job, and Linda would continue to sit patiently until he was ready to talk.

The clock continued to tick, however, and Lucifer hadn't moved from his position. Linda checked her watch and saw that the session was almost up, so it was time for her to intervene.

"So Chloe stopped by my house about three days ago," She began.

Lucifer's leg ceased its bouncing and his eyes trailed over to her face, but other than that, he didn't move.

"She told me, officially, about the pregnancy. We talked for a while and played with Charlie. She also showed me some pictures from the sonogram. How did that go by the way?"

Of course, Linda knew what happened at the sonogram. Chloe had filled her in on the details the other day. Today, Linda wanted to hear the story from Lucifer's perspective.

"Good." He said plainly with a nod.

Then his leg started bouncing again.

Linda tilted her head to the side and pressed, "But?"

He scrunched his eyebrows a bit and dropped his elbows, bringing his hands to grip on his knees with a small smack.

"Why do always you assume there's a 'but'?" He asked defensively.

"Because I know you,"

He scoffed and was about to make a comment about her knowing him when Linda continued, "And I know that, usually, when you're deflecting serious feelings, you give the barest amount of the truth, the very surface, while avoiding what's truly bothering you. So, please, how did the sonogram go for you last week?"

The sonogram took place about a week ago, and in that time, Lucifer had not talked about anything baby-related with Chloe, Amenadiel, Maze, or Linda. Chloe had decided to tell Dan about the pregnancy, figuring that he should know before Trixie, and well, it didn't go over so well to put it kindly, but that's a story for another time.

At the moment, Chloe was still working out how exactly she wanted to tell her daughter about becoming a big sister. Lucifer said that she was just being a chicken because Detective Douche reacted so poorly, but then again, wasn't Lucifer doing the exact same thing with his brother and friends?

Lucifer's face seemed to pale even more than it already was. He fidgeted with everything he could get his fingers on: his ring, cuff links, sleeves, shoe lace, a string on the couch, and even a few buttons.

"What can I say? They didn't stick a white wand up my vagina."

Linda's face deadpanned but she gave a small huff. He smiled with victory at the reaction his joke received from the doctor. So Linda decided to be more specific.

"What did you feel when you saw your baby on the monitor for the first time?" She asked the question slowly, using very specific words to prick at some of his nerves.

It seemed to work. He tensed up and seemed to freeze, remaining statue-like until he dryly replied, "It felt like the entire world was going to implode. That...tiny gray smudge floating among a screen of darker gray made everything more real. All of it." He gestured aimlessly toward the air, his expression remaining neutral.