IDENTITY-LESS

Chapter 4

It's happening again, I am relapsing. Ever since I saw him all I have been seeing is the tortured spirits of those who were murdered.

I sit up in bed as I continue to shake. I am terrified of my own dreams; they are nightmares I don't want to face. They are the truths of what these hands did. I never did it but physically, these hands slaughtered people, innocent people just for sport. He has no regret and he is probably sitting down there with his smug grin, waiting for his turn to inhabit me again. I will never let that happen. I will never sleep if that is what it takes.

''Good morning Adria'' the Michael look-a-like said softly as he put the glass of water and some breakfast next to my bed

''Morning'' I replied through a forced smile

''I know that this place seems bare but only the special ones come here'' he sighed ''ones with unusual cases or conditions''

''You think I am making this up, aren't you?'' I questioned

''No, I don't actually and I believe that there is a lot more going on than what everyone lets on'' he creased his brows and looked at me ''may I ask you something?''

I nodded and looked down, more questions, more pills and more of everything came from that simple question

''Why did you call me Michael? Is he your boyfriend?'' he looked sad, as if having a boyfriend outside these walls was anything anyway

''No'' I shook my head ''Archangel Michael saved me''

''So, you met him'' he said with a puzzled look ''I am certain he did it to help you but I am sure being in here doesn't help''

''What are you going on about if I may ask?'' I couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't real

A huge smile crossed his face, on that bared his teeth. I just sat frozen in one place, those teeth that belonged to him, the sharp-edged ones that were different sizes, ones that wouldn't just rip, they would tear you a part and kill you. These teeth would rip your very soul from your body.

''No...'' I mumbled out and I tried to move but I didn't even realise that the straps had made their way around my wrists and ankles. I started to cry, my tears weaving down my cheeks.

''Oh, how I miss possessing this little body'' he said and he ran his fingers along my legs and his eyes raked across my body ''you always used to just get me going without doing anything at all''

I shook my head to wake myself up.

''this is a dream'' I whimpered

''For now it is yes but I have control here'' he sighed and stood up again, locking eyes with me, those black soulless eyes ''but soon enough my dear I will be out in the world and I will come for you and I will make you wish you never let them take me from you''

'' I hope you liked the souls I sent to haunt you'' he said as he grabbed my throat and started to squeeze ''I remembered how much you hate feeling helpless''

I started to gasp for air once again and I couldn't even use my arms to try and pry his hands away

''Say my name and give me power over you!'' he demanded

''No'' I managed to croak out

I sat up clutching my throat again and the air rushed into my lungs, filling them up. Was that all one dream.

I looked around and saw that I was laying on the shower floor with the nurse calling for help. How long was I out for? What was going on?

''Adria'' I heard Samuel say ''get up and move before they think you are doing this for fun''

He knew that they just thought everything that happened to be was for attention because no one believed me, no one even cared to listen besides Samuel

I nodded and weakly tried to stand, my legs wobbly and my body felt numb. He covered me with a towel and helped me to the bed, he laid the clothes out and turned his back. I got dressed and sat down cross legged on the bed. My hair dripping wet.

''You have marks on your neck'' he pointed out ''who did that?''

''He did and the souls he sets lose on me'' I ran my fingers along my neck ''is this real?'' I whispered

''Adria what are you talking about?'' Sam asked

''He had me in a dream inside of a dream'' I muttered through quivering lips ''he had so much control and I had none''

Samuel put his hand over mine and gave it a little squeeze. I heard his sigh and I knew he was going to press for more questions about this and I would beat him to it

''He wanted me to give him power over me and to help him get back into this realm'' I said ''he wants to possess me again and do more harm than before and he even disguised himself as the male nurse over there'' I motioned my head towards the Michael look a like

''Kane?'' Samuel asked as he followed my head ''why him?''

''Maybe because I think he looks like Michael'' I shrugged

Samuel looked at me and had a puzzled look behind his eyes, questions brewing under that shell. He wanted to get his fingers onto the information that I had, that I was harbouring.

''I brought you what you asked for'' he said as he grunted, he passed me the small bag and he smiled as I accepted the gift

''Thank you'' I smiled ''I just hope this works as I really don't know what his next move will be on me and being down here doesn't help''

''I did some research on this place Adria'' he sighed ''this place you are in used to house those who were deemed too dangerous to be placed with the less mentally ill''

I sighed in defeat; I knew it was bad but for it to be this bad?

''Samuel why is it so quiet then?'' I whispered

''Adria you must understand that these walls are padded so it is sound proof'' he looked around ''after they pulled you off the floor with all the blood, they deemed you unfit''

I nodded and understood, I was not mentally ill but I was not getting better.

''May I ask more questions?'' Samuel politely asked as he rested his hand on his bag.

I knew that his visits would render nothing else anymore as my information to him was more valuable than who I was anymore, I nodded anyway

He tapped record on the tape recorder and once again set it on the table

''Continuation of the last session, it is Monday'' he said and cleared his throat ''Adria please state your consent for continue''

''Yes father'' I replied

''Thank you'' he nodded ''I just want to know one thing before I question you''

I nodded

''Are you often plagued by the faces of those whom the entity hurt?'' he asked. That question was direct, to direct. I started to feel the panic rise

''what?'' I breathed out

''it's just that other cases we have had people whom survived the exorcism and they have nightmares about what happened'' he placed his hand over mine and I relaxed

''I am'' I sighed ''they haunt me more than anything father''

''Go on'' he smiled

''They blame me and they hurt me'' I bared my neck to him ''these faint lines were their hands as well as his and the scary thing was it felt so real that I thought I was really going to die''

''it is okay'' Samuel reassured me