Find Me

...Winter

Rey stretched her arms and legs, pushing the heavy thick wool duvet off her. The sun was shining through the large window making the room seem so cosy and bright like the first time she woke up in Maz's house. Oh, Maz... She didn't want to think about it, so she turned over, lying on her stomach and hugged the pillow. It smelled so nice like orange blossom and Christmas. She furrowed with her eyes still closed. She didn't even know for sure the date. It was obviously winter, but the month and day were a mystery to her. Everything was a mystery to her.

She inhaled the orange blossom once more and exhaled exhausted. The previous day had been too much for her. After the hug, she ended up wiping her tears again and avoiding Ben's gaze. The hug only made things more awkward between the two.

He scratched the back of his head.

"You must be hungry. Would you like to join me for dinner?"

She nodded. She wasn't really sure whether she was truly hungry or not, but she knew she had to eat something and Ben inviting her to dinner was finally some progress, especially if it helped with the awkwardness and with getting used to each other. Besides, with Finn rejecting her, she was in need of an ally and Ben seemed... well... he was probably the only who knew the most about her as the woman she had been before, the woman wearing those clothes from the walk-in closet upstairs.

She sat again at the table and watched him all quiet like a scolded child. After he finished unpacking everything, he opened a cabinet and took out two bowls, two plates, the cutlery and two mugs, and set the table all by himself. Rey was chewing a strand of hair, while staring at the purplish galaxy-themed plates, knowing exactly that they were made of high-quality glossy ceramics and that each plate cost a lot. Made to order.

"It seems Luke forgot to leave your prescription."

Rey flinched. Prescription for what?

"I can make you some tea in case you won't be able to sleep."

"I'll... thanks," she said taking the bowl of cauliflower soup. She took a bite out of the garlic bread and started eating while Ben was still brooding. He was not a bad man. A bad would not have taken care of a long lost wife who didn't even remember him, nor feed her like that. The cauliflower soup was one of her favourites and despite this one not being as delicious as Maz's and the garlic bread no longer being fresh, it was still a feast. She was very hungry after all.

She ate her soup quietly and so did Ben holding his bowl in his hand. His hands were huge she observed. But they were not scary at all. They looked so delicate and gentle. And those fingers... those fingers...

"Are you ok?" Ben stood up suddenly and ran to her.

She stopped coughing and waved her hand trying to explain without words that she was fine. Her old dirty mind wasn't however, as it once again sent her body some tingling feelings. And now his palm was on her leg and it was burning her.

"I was... my mind faded out and I choked on a chunk of bread. But I am ok."

"Are you sure?"

Jesus, those eyes. She blinked and looked down to her fingers in order to not end up hypnotized by his eyes. He was not really a conventionally good looking man, but he was handsome. Incredibly handsome actually. And her heart was once his... and her body too, but she didn't remember that part.

"Your face is red. Do you feel hot? I have some meds in-"

"I'm ok," she said a little bit too loudly while covering her cheeks with her palms.

Ben sighed realizing that there was no point in insisting and went back to his seat rather grumpy.

"Do you want some sweet and spicy turkey with beetroot and feta cheese salad?"