Controlee

39. Goodbye

Rule 9: Tears don't help anyone.

Otsuka had never been to a funeral before, but she knew she'd probably end up at a lifetime's worth of them by the end of the month. Aizawa and Yamada had taken her to buy a black dress and cardigan she could wear, and while dresses weren't exactly her favourite, it was comfortable.

Mags had told her a long time ago funerals weren't so much for the dead as for the living and she doubted she'd ever find a clearer example of that than these. The services for the dead controlees had every right to be quiet affairs. Some of the dead hadn't seen friends or family in years, the number of people who noticed their deaths, who were impacted by them, should've been small. But in each funeral she sat through, family curled close together, friends close by with all the support they could offer. There wasn't a soul left to mourn alone.

She, Aizawa, and Yamada had been travelling the country, a grief-ridden road trip taking off whenever Otsuka was informed of another ceremony. She kept telling her guardians they didn't have to take her, she could get a train or a bus or whatever she needed to and run the rest of the way, it was fine by her, they had their own busy lives. Aizawa had two jobs, Yamada had three, they really shouldn't be ferrying her around Japan. She gave up trying to tell them she'd be fine on her own when they caught her trying to sneak out to make a train. They weren't even angry, they just told her that she could take the train if she wanted, but they'd meet her at the other end, having driven anyway.

It was so stupid of them, but she appreciated the sentiment.

That was how the three of them found themselves alone in the nearest Catholic Church to UA, a priest at the front speaking the same lines he'd probably spoken a hundred times over already this year. The man was unfazed by the low numbers for this service, continuing as ever for the sakes of those few souls who did come and for the soul of the dearly departed.

Otsuka 'Mags' Margaret, or Margaret 'Mags' Otsuka as she'd been born in a small town in Australia exactly twenty-one years ago no matter how many times the younger children asked her was not exactly the most devout of believers. She didn't pray before every meal, didn't go to church every Sunday, didn't give thanks to God for all she had earned in her life, but she did believe, and there had definitely been days when she'd prayed for the kids under her care.

She'd dreamed of moving to Japan since she was a child, a mixture of pure enamour with the culture mixed with a love for the language, but she never thought she'd end up living there, not when her parents— both true believers in God— had long since made it clear they wanted her to be a lawyer. And young Margaret, a little uncertain about what she really wanted to do with her life, chose to follow their dream for her. She was good at being a lawyer, her quirk suited it like a forest suited the sun, maybe she didn't enjoy it all that much but there was a certain satisfaction at every debate she won as she trained for it.

She was nineteen when her parents died in a terrible accident, nothing to be done, no-one to blame. She'd left for Japan not a month later, no real idea how she would manage it, but a powerful determination to find a way. There was time spent as a teacher for a range of ages, time spent as a child therapist, until eventually she was approached by a stranger who'd seen her qualifications and decided she fit better than anyone else they'd met. The next day was her first at the control school, and she excelled far beyond their expectations.

Just like that, she'd burned her way into the path she realised she loved more than anything. This was what she'd always been meant for, not law. Slowly, oh so slowly, she forgot all those prayers her parents had taught her.

It wasn't too long before she was made head of the control school, and no matter how often she was asked to rise the ranks further, she never agreed. She could do more good taking care of this one school well, than trying to better every school in the continent and she knew it. Nothing would convince her otherwise.