One More Time

40

"So, are you set to leave Kolkata for some days?",asked Koustav trying hiding his worries. But her silence made him more impatient every passing moment.

Ria's mind started to roll the memories of their very starting of their married life." Could it be called a proper life?",murmured Ria, to which Koustav gave her a confused look. "Nothing....I just couldn't believe my ears and fate for some time. But where are we going?"

"Daringbadi",Koustav answered while taking out their duffel bag." You put the clothes here....no need to pack them...I'll do that.",he added. Opening the almirah ,she looked for her clothes. "But for how many days?",Ria saw him standing behind her with the medicines in his palm with the bottle held on another hand. After making Ria swallowing the tablets Koustav replied ,"3".

"Don't take anything heavy.",he added further, "What were you murmuring then?"

Ria-  Just some old stuffs.

Koustav- As in?

Ria- Days before our marriage, the starting days of us....how you couldn't accept me.......and all.

Koustav came towards her and took the folded clothes from her hands, Ria felt odd as he didn't answer anything. Looking backward she found he was putting them inside the duffel bag. He chained the bag close and kept it in the corner. He huffed.

Ria- So what now?

Koustav(in low voice)-  Its time to sleep. Go to the bed.

Like a obedient kid, Ria came from the corner ,near the bed and sat. Her mind trying to invade his thoughts. Koustav could have answered all , but at this point, the tension of Ujaan ,the excitement of having a baby were all mixed. He knew his words would make her mood more sour. Plus, the thought of how she would react hearing of the news started bugging him more.

Ria( looking at his back)- I'm not sleepy at all. Please say something. What are you thinking so deeply?

Koustav- Don't stress yourself by thinking all the same things. Tell me, if I had continued being a typical widower,would you ,yourself and this society have let me live? If I change-its my fault....if I don't....that too-my fault. Don't you think that you complain too much?

Ria slowly turned to her side. She heard him getting up from the bed.The sound of him trying to find his smoke and matchbox were way too known to Ria's ears. She closed her eyes quite forcefully.  For long,she waited to hear him returning but she heard none.

Koustav went to the far end of the roof. He lighted his smoke and stopped when half of the box was empty. He was clearly angry with himself for being rude to her. He took his time. He looked at his then room. This room had been his cocoon for last 3 years. He was obsessed with her memories as he never considered her dead. He stood there just looking at her photo as she stopped coming in his dreams.The charm was gone as well as his self-blaming,and obsession.Nikita had become a beautiful memory now."A strong new bond has overpowered your older bond Koustav.",said his inner-self.

Around 12 he came back to his now room. Ria was sleeping on her sides. He  silently went to his side and slept.

The next morning, Binni was surprised to see Ria already in kitchen, making some tea. As the Basus made it late returning home last night, Binni stayed with Titli. Ria went near the sofa and sat there folding her legs with the hot cup of tea.

On the other hand, Koustav was scared not finding her beside him. He had made a mental note last night of apologising to her. With the aim and the packets of shopping he came downstairs. He found her cosily sitting on the sofa.