A Delicate Web (gxg) | ONC2020 |

9. sunlight and silence

chapter nine: sunlight and silence

word count: 1652

The next few days, I'm virtually trapped inside the Freeling palace. Every part of me itches to go back, to find Neilson and figure out what he's doing. How can I live knowing that a giant, undiscovered life form lives under my city, the city I try to protect, and still go on pretending life is normal?

It's like my mother purposely keeps me where I am, forcing me to take part in making plans for my eighteenth birthday. She's maneuvered me into throwing a formal party, an old-style ball of sorts, and keeps me busy night and day planning decor and outfits and buffet options and thousands of invitations to people I don't know or like. The restlessness has started to wear down on me.

At least she doesn't try to stop me from inviting Gem. She accepts, too.

The day before the party, I send her a ping. She answers nearly immediately.

"Hi, Princess."

"Gemini," I reply, staring at myself in the mirror. I assess the makeup options before me. "Would you like to meet up for another interview?"

Her voice is surprised over the call. "Oh—an interview? Sure, I'd love to. After your party sometime?"

"No, right now."

"Now?"

"Is that a problem?"

"Not at all, I just—I won't have any questions prepared."

"That's alright. Hell, don't even ask any questions if you don't want to. I don't care."

She's quiet for a long moment, and I open up an eyeshadow palette and examine the colours, then put it away again.

"This isn't actually an interview, is it?"

I find myself smiling. "What are you accusing me of?"

"I'm accusing you of asking me to hang out."

I crack a grin, unable to help myself. "I would never."

"Whatever you say. When should I be there?"

"Oh, no, I was thinking maybe we could go somewhere else," I say hastily. "I don't... really want to be at home."

"Oh. Won't people recognize you?"

"I can disguise myself. We'll go somewhere not too public. Have you ever been down to Castle Park?"

"A few times, with my family."

"I'll meet you there in two hours."

After we hang up, I dress casually, in sweatpants and a baggy grey sweater. I've learned that people don't tend to give me a second glance if I look like any regular citizen, rather than the princess they know, draped in elegance and finery. Still, to be safe, I pull my hair into a high ponytail and put on a baseball cap—something that's recently come back into style. The only makeup I bother with is some concealer, to hide the bruises that still linger, blotchy and yellow, around my throat.

I head out of my suite half an hour before I need to be there and down to the main floor of the palace, tugging at the hem of my sweater before fishing out the keys for my aeropod. Servants scuttle out of my way, offering hasty apologies or greetings. I've nearly made it to the front door when a hand stops me, taking hold of my arm. I wheel around to face my apprehender.

"Where do you think you're going?" My father asks.

I wrench my arm out of his grip, avoiding his gaze. "Out."

"Dressed like that? It's not suitable for you to be seen like this."

"Good thing I'm not trying to be seen."

"You're going to destroy our public image. If anyone gets a picture of you like this—"

"Your public image, you mean. Yours and Mom's. I don't care about any of that."

We glare at each other for a long moment, and I can feel my resolve wavering, even though I'm determined not to back down.

"I don't want to be late," I say at last, reaching for the scanner at the door. It recognizes my presence and beeps green, then the doors slide open.

"Late for what? Who are you meeting?"

My teeth are hurting with how tightly my jaw is clenched. "No one. Just a friend."

"A friend? Since when do you have friends?"

The comment seems to punch all the air out of my chest, and I whirl on him again.

"Shut up!" I seethe. "Just shut up! I can have a life outside of this stupid family and my stupid job as royalty, okay? I don't care about any of this, alright? I don't care about public image, I don't care about what the press thinks of me, I don't care about parties or politics or what you and Mom want—"

His hand catches the side of my face, and it feels like fire erupts across my face. I'm shocked into silence, staring at him wide-eyed, mouth agape, holding my face where he slapped me. Every muscle in my body freezes up.

I've been hit before. I've nearly been killed before. But nothing has hurt as much as this.

And for once, I can't bring myself to fight back like I usually do.

"Your mother and I are trying to give you the best future possible, and you don't even care! You don't give a fuck about your duties, your—"

I shake my head in disgust, still holding my face, and step outside. The door shuts before I can hear the rest of what he says, and even as it slides open again so he can call after me, I'm already running to my aeropod, parked on the long, smooth driveway.

—

Castle Park is the only place in Capital that still boasts real trees. About three square miles, it's a sprawling expanse of birdsong and concrete walking paths and a man-made lake in the center, a haven amidst the bustling expanse of Capital City.

When I arrive, Gemini is waiting for me already, an arm slung across the back of the park bench she sits on. Sunlight filters through the canopy of leaves above, throwing dapples of yellow light across her face. She recognizes me and smiles, but the expression drops off of her face as I get nearer.

My face still stings. I was hoping the slap hadn't left a mark, but apparently I'm not that lucky, because Gemini gets to her feet and hurriedly closes the distance between us.

"Maud, what happened to your face?"

Normally, the sound of my name on her lips makes butterflies awaken in my stomach. Now, the only thing there is the coiling, hissing snake of pain and rage that still seems to burn me from the inside out. My anger tastes metallic on my tongue.

I push past her.

"Nothing. It's fine."

She follows after me, stopping me with a hand on my arm. I'm tempted to lash out in memory of the way my father apprehends me in this same manner, but her touch is different, softer and gentler, not meant to restrain. I stop.

"Fuck, Maud. Did someone hit you?'

"No."

Her dark eyes search my face, seeing clear through me.

"Was it your dad?"

She's too intuitive.

I sit down heavily on the park bench, burying my face in my hands and scrubbing at the space between my brows. I feel Gem's presence as she sits down next to me, hands gripping the edge of the bench on either side of her.

"Are you alright?"

I nod, pulling my hands away and staring up at the rustling green branches above. A bird flits past, wings edged in gold sunlight.

"Let me look."

I sigh but turn my face towards her. She leans closer and puts her hands on my cheeks, sun-washed palms warm against my skin. I feel my heart rate beginning to settle, the snake in me withering. It's hard to be angry with her around.

Her thumb brushes the sore spot and I wince, but I don't flinch or pull away.

"It won't bruise."

"I know," I say. "It was just a slap."

"I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I deserve it."

She pulls her hands away. "How can you say that?"

I shake my head and look away again, leaning back against the bench and staring out at the gently rippling lake water. The sunlight glints off of it, the same sunlight that rests on our shoulders. It should be making me feel warmer, but a coldness has settled in my chest.

"I just do. I'm an awful heir. My parents are right to be disappointed in me."

She probably thinks I'm oversharing. I know her well enough to let the words spill out, but to her, I'm the princess that she's only ever met once before.

"I'm sorry, this is probably annoying," I say. "Let's talk about something else."

"It's not annoying, Maud."

"Sure."

"I'm serious."

"Why should you care?"

"Why shouldn't I?'

I can't come up with a rebuttal for that. I swallow and keep staring resolutely ahead, determined not to look at her. I don't want to see the understanding in her face.

"I'm sorry about your story," I say at last. Her brows furrow in confusion, but I continue. "You're not going to get anything about a conspiracy, or royal family secrets." I can feel my voice growing softer, drowsier, as I crane my head backwards again to watch the clouds, carefree and unhindered, wander the sky. "There's just me failing to please my mom and my dad again and again no matter how much I try." I shrug. "So I just... don't anymore, I guess. That's okay with me. But now you know what goes on in my family, since you wanted that so badly. Sorry if it's disappointing, but that's... all there is."

She leans back next to me, staring up at the sky as well, not looking at me. The warmth of her hand finds me, though, and her fingers tangle themselves around mine and squeeze tight. The coldness in my chest seems to lighten, and together, we sit there, bathed in sunlight and silence.