Trust

Trust: Chapter 24

'Shay... answer me.' Dominic said whilst rubbing my arm, I shrugged him off and closed my eyes. I couldn't go home without Tyrell. How could all of this happen on my birthday? It was meaningless without having my baby boy safe and healthy. He was having difficulty breathing on his own so they'd placed him in intensive care. He was laying in a clear box. To me it reminded me so much of a coffin, except it was just see through and your baby was still alive. It made me sick to my stomach seeing him laying there in an incubator. Dominic and I left the room and went back in the corridor where my mum, Rochelle, Dominic's mum were. 

'Where's Aisha?' I asked mum and she looked at me.

'She had to stay and look after Aidan and Mia, I didn't want to bring them to upset them-'

'So they know?'

'Nope, I just had Aisha tell them we went somewhere.' I looked at Dominic and his eyes were red. I sat down next to Rochelle and she looked at me.

'Aren't you hungry?' I shook my head and she sighed.

'Thirsty?'

'I'm fine.'

'You need to have something to eat or-'

'I SAID I'M FINE.' I shouted and everyone looked at me, Rochelle nodded slowly and stood up putting on her coat.

'I think it's time I leave, I need to get back to Kya.' I laughed and she looked at me weirdly.

'What?'

'Yeah you go home, go back to your perfectly healthy baby whilst mine lays here with tubes inside of him helping him to do something so simple as breathe-'

'It isn't my fault Shay-'

'Nah, don't worry about me. You can leave your best friend here and go back home, I don't need you.'

'Don't blame me for this, I didn't ask for Tyrell to be ill.'

'This is exactly what I get, this is my punishment for what I did to Wayne isn't it?' I asked her and she shook her head. She bent down to my level and held my hands in hers.

'None of this is your fault, Tyrell just isn't well babe.' A tear fell down my cheek and Dominic put his arm around me.

'He's a few weeks old!'

'I know Shay, I know. I'm so sorry. He'll recover, I promise you.' She hugged me tightly and then hugged Dominic before she left the hospital. I rested my head on Dominic's shoulder and just let the tears roll down my cheeks. It was so silent you could hear a pin drop, no-one was talking and everyone was avoiding eye contact.

Maybe this was God's way of punishing me for what I'd done to Wayne, I didn't mean for him to die but yet I didn't care that he did. All I wanted was my son, I would give my health just so he could be okay again. I never thought I'd hear myself saying this or feeling this way. It was a type of love I couldn't explain, it was weird bonding with a baby as soon as you look at them and feeling overwhelming love for them. Dominic kissed my forehead lightly and stood up.

'We should go home, get washed and then we can come back alright Shay?'

'I can't leave him here on his own.'

'Mum will stay, won't you?' He said looking at his mum and she nodded.

'Of course I will, you all go home and relax. Get some sleep.' I stood up reluctantly and Dominic and I left the hospital, we got into his car and drove to our new home in silence. Once we reached I got out and he unlocked the front door, I took my heels off and went upstairs to shower. It didn't even feel like a warm new home, it felt cold, like I was in a strangers home. It wouldn't ever be home until Tyrell was back. I wrapped my towel around me once I'd gotten out and brushed my teeth. I was thankful that Dominic had moved everything in for me so I wouldn't have to do anything. I washed out my mouth and went back into the bedroom where he was laying on the bed asleep.