Yanessa's Castle

I used to think life would be so easy

Chapter 1

When I was fourteen, I thought everything was so easy for adults. They got to have all the fun and plus I really wanted to know how it felt to kiss a boy. I used to think to myself, "I'll get three sugar daddies'," One will pay my rent, the other my car". I thought it would be a piece of cake; until then the day turned nineteen, I realized that's NOT the type of girl who I want to be. Fast forward to 2020, I go to the most prestige College in all of Braxtonville. First-year for Travel and Tourism at George Ford. Have I been thinking about this career since I was 5 years old? No, but I was damn sure excited to get out of this shithole of a city. I was excited for the day I would graduate but not the first day I walked through the doors. That's why I had to do it a second time and honestly, I hated the learning part, but I loved that part after... 'my career'.

Now to think of it I have the rest of the semester off because of COVID-19; I've been thinking, do I really want to be a flight attendant anyways? Sure, I watched that movie with Gwyneth Paltrow and she was a small-town girl who became a flight attendant. She stayed at a lower level position so she could live with this guy. My mom says that Gwyneth Paltrow has always been rich from the day she was born. The movie was her basically pretending that she was this poor girl in all actuality that was false.

I want to travel, and I was so ready to escape to this old city with no opportunities, and go to Hawaii or even Mexico. Yes, I love to sing, and dance and I write my own music but the only thing I was lacking was confidence. I didn't even start to notice how I looked until other people did first. (Not in a good way)

I never experienced bullying until grade three and I'm pretty sure it was because they thought I was a lesbian. Now I do like guys but on the other hand, I can't lie how hot some girls are. I remember when my mom took me to get some clothes for the new school year. I was about to be in grade eight. All I remember is a girl with green eyes said excuse me, I don't know why I felt different, but I knew I thought she was so beautiful. In grade 11, there was a girl named Sarah. I saw here every day until one day I saw her differently. I noticed how beautiful she was. Every day she started coming to school wearing a confederation belt. I should have been taught about that in black history month in the school but mostly all my teachers were white. I didn't know what that meant and then she told me, I never wanted to think about it again. Trust me I still love my men but a bit older if you know what I mean. Okay, Not that old but. I can admit that I haven't been an angel anytime soon and I've been sleeping with a man that's married. I knew I loved that fact that he was older, and he made me feel good, but I then realized that I didn't know what love was or if it even existed.

COVID-19. Is it real? Or is it fake? Some people say that it's a scam by the Chinese government, others say that Donald Trump is exaggerating the whole situation. Then I heard on a video that it was something to stop black people from succeeding. I am getting worried because mostly all the schools in the world are shut down and I can't stop thinking that God's coming back. All I wanted to do was so badly run away but of course, trains are stopping and people were being quarantined. It all started because some idiots wanting to sell live animals and dead ones in the same bloody area. It's amazing how the world works but it's also scary! at the same time. The truth was I felt like everything wasn't real like maybe If I die then I will soon wake up.

Not too long ago, in grade 11 I remember when Justin Trudeau was elected for the prime minister. All my friends except for some were talking about how hot he was. My other friend said his balls were probably so low and saggy. I didn't think about that part, I don't know. I think that he shouldn't have been voted for Prime Minister, maybe I don't read what he does that often. It's funny how this guy gets pulled with doing blackface on two separate occasions and was elected again. Or the fact that he is building a pipeline over Native people's land. I think this world is sick. I can't speak for everyone in this world, but I can truly say that the world is striking back. The Australia fire's, Hurricane Dorian and now the Coronavirus. Maybe we should feel normal about all these things happening, but I do not. I know when I finish school, I will have to encounter many natural disasters. I don't know why but I've always had a weird interest in them. So that' why my first option at Braxtonville I wanted to go for Journalism, so it's cool that I have a friend that's in the program. His wife has COVID-19, I hope she gets well soon. If she has it he has to have it.