Although he might snip a button off your overcoat and explain it only by shouting the cryptic clue "parallelogram," Red is not a beautiful woman with thrilling eyes and he would never consider giving away a cinnamon roll or anything else for that matter. So, we won't even try for the perfect opening to this tale. Red is our resident amateur bookie, practical joker, and Miri's boyfriend. He hadn't been around much lately which was odd since we were coming up on March Madness, the college basketball tournament that even people who never gamble will be throwing a few bucks at in the sweet sixteen pool that Red usually runs this time of year.
When Red finally did show up, he came through the door sporting a leather jacket and carrying a motor cycle helmet. This was a bit out of character. Red viewed himself more of a sophisticated hustler than as a Hell's Angel.
"A little too soon for a midlife crisis isn't it Red?"
Red who is normally quick to pick up on any taunt and return it with spin, uncharacteristically just said, "Huh?"
"The helmet? Are you into motorcycles now?"
"Sort of. I sold my car and got a good deal on this bike."
"Going to be a bit rough if we get some more snow?"
"Probably," he mumbled. He took his seat at the bar and I got him a beer. I'd never seen Red like this. He is the quintessential poker player so reading his mood was not easy, but if I had to guess, I would say he had just been dealt a jack high bust.
I gave him some time to reacquaint himself with his libation. Then I had to ask, "Haven't seen you around for a while. You going to start up your March Madness pool?"
"Don't think I'm going to this year. I'm having a run of bad luck and I'm a little short of funds. You don't happen to know anyone who might be hiring around here, do you?"
"Can't say I do. I have to admit, Red, I don't know what kind of work you do. I assumed you were some kind of professional gambler."
"Gambler? Always. Professional? Some times more than others, but I'm not a full-time player. I have — or rather had a regular job."
"What sort of work do you do?"
"I've done all sorts, sales, marketing, public relations, general office work, filing, even some accounting. My last job was with the KGID."
"You weren't working at the water treatment plant, were you?"
"Yeah, how did you know?"
"Lucky guess," I sighed hoping I wouldn't have to explain further.
"Joe, if you don't mind, don't tell Miri I lost my job. I'd like to keep that on the downlow until I find another one."
"She won't hear it from me." I assured him, but I had no doubt the news would eventually reach her. News travels fast at Joe's and everyone would be curious about Red's new riding hood.
