If I Love Myself[On Hold]

Chapter 9

Demons, Alec Benjamin

Quote;

Where there is life,
There is hope.

Chapter 9. (Trigger Warning: Flashback of sexual assault)

     Reluctantly, I took a shower. The heat is refreshing and much needed after weeks of cleaning up inside of a gas station bathroom. However, I can hardly ignore the slight twinge of pain when the water hits my thighs.

     He pushed me onto the bed, his gaze holding mine. "I love you. You love me right?"

     I lather the cloth in soap, I scrub at my skin. My stomach twisting in knots as I remember him, that night, his hands.

     I nod and he grips my chin, squeezing. "Say it."

     "I l-love - I love you."

     Scrubbing at my skin until it turns pink, I wipe the tears from my eyes.

     "Stop crying, you bitch!" He screams, yanking my hair. "You're ruining the whole mood, bet you like that, huh?"

     "N-no."

     "Then wipe your fucking tears and make me feel good! You're so damn sensitive. You're acting like you didn't want this."

     Wiping the tears fromy eyes, I sniffle. "I'll do better, p-promise."

     It's my fault, all my fa-

     A knocking sounds on the door and I shut off the faucet. Stepping out of the shower and snagging a towel, I wrap it tightly around me. Opening the door slightly, I peek through the crack.

     "Hi sweetie," the woman says, softly. "I brought you some clothes. Sorry if the size is wrong hon, I did my best."

     "They're fine, thank you."

     She hands the clothes to me and leaves, the steps creaking slightly as she heads down the stairs. I dry off, wringing my hair out, and hurrily change into the clothes. The sleeves are not as long as I'd like them to be, which unfortunately, don't hide the bruises on my arms.

     So much for good luck.

      Leaving the bathroom, I make my way down the steps. The adorable sound of squeals and giggles distract me. I head into the living room and find Michelle being tickled by an older woman. The same one who brought me the clothes.

     The woman looks up at me, smiling warmly. "Hi sweetie, ain't tell you my name before but it's Erica. I'm the granny to this adorable," she kisses Michelle's cheek. "Little girl."

     Erica glances at my arm, her eyes softening. She holds her hand out to me and my chest tightens. Heading over towards her, I reach out and she clasps my hand.

     "I get it." She whispers, squeezing my hand gently. "You ever wanna talk, I'm here for you honey."

     Nodding, she pats my hand.

     "Now, what's your name?"

     "L- Cyrus. My name is Cyrus."

     Her brows raise slightly, "Like the singer? Kylie, Rylie-"

     "Miley."

     "Right, right. Beautiful name."

     Michelle stares up at me, a frown forming on her face. "Your name is Layla!"