Today My Life Begins (Bruno Mars Fan Fiction)

Chapter 46

     It's New Years Eve and I'm so ready for this year to be over and to start new, I'm ready for a new future with Bruno and I'm trying to plan my future free of drama, but we have to catch Calvin and put him away for good. On our way back from Vegas wasn't something I was expecting while we traveled back to L.A. The rest of the band and Nicole rode on the bus while Phil drove Savannah's escalade with her in the passenger seat and Bruno and I sat in the back seat. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder but continued to look outside the window barely talking to me. I didn't understand what he was looking at, it was pitch black out and it didn't help that the windows were tinted, so he was staring into complete darkness and practically ignoring me. To keep the drive back home from being quiet Savannah used my phone to play from my music library to keep noise in the car from dying out and to lighten up the mood. Lots of music we were all familiar with and very few bands that only Savannah and I were only familiar with. Every time my favorite band came on I always looked over to Bruno to see his reaction that I was afraid of, I kept thinking he might thought I was weird, but he always nodded to it, that always made me feel better. We stopped paying attention until the song I always listened to or thought of when I felt that I didn't deserve Bruno came on and immediately made everything in the car drown out as the song echoed off the glass windows. How could I drag him in all of this fucked up life of mine that just continues to throw daggers at me and him. When I hurt, I bring him down with me and I feel selfish for staying, selfish for keeping him and I hate that I love him so much that I want him all to myself. The lyrics hit me hard as I looked over over to Bruno as he held me a little tighter as we listened to the heavy lyrics that seemed to hit him too.

"I gave my everything for all the wrong things, in this cold reality I made this selfish war machine. Oh this has become hell! How can I share this life with someone else? I promise you, there is no weight can bury us beneath the ghost of all my guilt. Here in the dark side of me..." 

I jumped out of my day dream when I felt the tear fall down my cheek. I looked up into the dawn sky from my balcony, holding my cigarette in my right hand and my left arm wrapped around my stomach. I had been cramping all night but it has calmed down since, but I haven't started my period yet, it was starting to worry me but I should be okay, I'm not suppose to get my 3 month shot till tomorrow. I took another long drag as I felt the December California breeze hit my face. It was cool but still so warm, so very warm than what I was use to I could have mistaken this breeze for early morning July breeze. I stood outside in my bright red tank top and my black sweat pants and every other minute I would turn around and see Bruno sleeping on his back with his face turned away from me. I took the last drag from my cigarette before tossing it in the old coffee can I saved and walked inside to wash my hands and brush my teeth. After I was done I started walking into my room but soon enough found my face just a few inches away from the floor trying to catch my breath. I took a few short breaths before trying to get up but the more I tried to move the more pain I was in. I held myself up on all fours to stop this sharp pain that ricochet from my hips, down my legs sending my body into uncomfortable numbing pain that made me want to scream. I looked up and seen Bruno hasn't even moved, but I couldn't take it anymore, I fought the pain and jumped up and ran back into the bathroom, shut the door and locked it behind me and I sat down on the toilet. I felt sharp pains running up and down my abdomen that finally made me cry out a scream. I didn't understand what was going on, I moved my hand down there to find I was bleeding a lot. 

     I woke up to Marceline screaming in the bathroom, I jumped up and tried opening the door and began pounding on it, "Marci! Whats wrong?" I could hear her trying to catch her breath while trying to contain her crying, "Marci, please baby answer me." I tried opening the door again. 

"No please stop. I'm fine." Her voice made her sound like she was in agony pain. 

"What's wrong baby? Is there anything I can do to help?" I heard her scream again.