We Taught Ourselves to Smile

Part 8

Kobra

Kobra's chest had been healing up nicely and before long, even the constant shortness of breath had faded. It still hurt, he refused to take the painkillers offered by Benze, but at least he was able to walk around now. Poison could barely stand, and had spent the last two days in their room with Ghoul. He could hear them sometimes, laughing and singing together, and found himself wishing for the same thing with Sandman. He hadn't seen the other boy since he had woken up, though Benze told him earlier that he had sat next to him nearly the whole time, only leaving because Poison kicked him out. He couldn't stop himself from smiling the whole time Benze told him. Sandman really did care about him, didn't he?

But in all honesty, Kobra had been spending a lot of time with Sandman's crew, Benzedrine, American Beauty, and American Psycho. They were kind and very different from his own crew, which was almost a welcome change. Psycho was very similar to Ghoul, he found, they were both loud and sarcastic, though Psycho seemed to focus more on just confusing people instead of pissing them off. Beauty was quiet, but once he started talking you could hear the intelligence behind his words, he was the type to listen to and absorb everything he heard. Benze was one of the nicest people Kobra had ever met, he was always patient when Kobra asked a million questions about life under the city or didn't want to take the drugs. They called themselves the Youngbloods, and Kobra had spent more time with them and Jet lately, learning about their lives and telling them his favorite things about the desert, like how when the sun sets is looks like whole world is on fire, or how on the very rare chance that it snows, everyone collectively loses their shit, not going inside until it's gone.

Wandering through the house, he heard the sound of a bike engine and glanced out the window to see Sandman's shock of pink hair as he sped across the sand, making turns and dodging invisible obstacles. Occasionally he's fall, his hands just barely saving his face from impact, but he'd always stand up, adjust his goggles, and get back on. Kobra found himself smiling as the other boy tried the same turn half a dozen times and kept falling, then resolved to go help him.

As he stepped out into the sun, Sandman pulled up next to him and grinned, taking off the goggles and bandanna he was using to keep out sand.

"How're you feeling, Dear?" His voice was light, and Kobra couldn't hold back a smile at his infectious energy.

"Pretty good actually, all things considered," he shrugged, slipping his hands into his jacket pockets. They started walking together, talking pointlessly about things that didn't really matter, until Sandman hooked his arm through Kobra's and the topic shifted to them.

"So are we going to talk about it?" Sandman asked nervously.

"Talk about what?" Kobra knew exactly what he meant, but he still hadn't processed what had happened. He always got nervous before claps, and though he tried his best to hide it, when he got nervous he was impulsive, did things he would barely even consider normally. The kiss was wonderful, he didn't regret it for a second, but he was worried about the reactions of his crew, or rather Ghoul and Poison.

"You kissed me. And I don't know why, but it's all I could think about ever since. I know you need time and everything, but I'm going crazy, and I need to know if this is going somewhere." They had stopped walking, the two boys not quit facing each other, and Kobra picked at his nails, silent. "I'm willing to wait, but I just need to know that there's something to wait for ."

"I know, and I'm sorry. I like you a lot, I really do, but Poison's my sibling, I love them so much and I just want them to be happy, and they are, they're so happy with Ghoul it makes my chest hurt. And you nearly fucked that up for them, twice, and I realize there were other factors at work than just you being an asshole, but Ghoul doesn't and they don't. They're both so stubborn it'd take a miracle for them to forgive you, they'll hate me." he glanced at Sandman, fiddling with something on his jacket.