on track [ hyunho au ]

epilogue :')

shit is about to get really sad, i'm sorry xD

chapter one: [i like boys more]
[ pov: jeongin ]

"so who wants to be the male lead then?", seungmin asked, looking around in our group. minho's and hyunjin's hand shot up almost immediately.

why would hyunjin want to do that? he loved creating art through his camera, not by acting. that wasn't him.
i tried to tell myself that this was the reason of why i wanted interfere, not because i was-

"so do we vote, or-..?" felix trailed off. i quickly tugged on hyunjin's arm, suggesting something else.
"no! let's just take minho i mean no offense hyung, your visuals would definitely be more than enough for this role i mean you're so gorgeous and pretty and- yeah.. bUt we all know how good you are as a cameraman so we shouldn't waste your skills!"

i was so glad everyone agreed but hyunjin just stared me down. i felt guilt build up in my chest, making it feel heavy. maybe i shouldn't have done that.

chapter two: [what if¿]
[ pov: jeongin ]

"i will run behind them so it looks more realistic, yeah? i mean, a school isn't usually that empty!", i suggested happily, getting into position only a few minutes after that. my happiness disappeared as i saw hyunjin staring at yeri and minho like that. the look in his eyes.. he was clearly jealous. ouch.

we started running and hyunjin was right behind me, filming all of us. it made me so nervous.

after a few seconds i slowed down and jogged next to hyunjin, watching his focused face and his slim fingers holding the camera which such an elegance - i just wanted him to hold me like that.

chapter three: [cute]
[ pov: jeongin]

as i entered the room yeri was saying "we look cute together, don't you think?", while smiling at minho.
"mhm, but hyunjin is cuter!", i said truthfully, walking towards all of them.

"thanks but no.", hyunjin chuckled, patting the seat next to him for me to sit. i plopped down on it, happy that he wanted me to sit here.

"well, i'd say equally cute. hyunjin's a snack.", minho said while winking at my hyunjinnie. he did nOT just do that! i couldn't stop an angry sound from leaving my lips.

hyunjin was blushing. everything was going the wrong way. i hugged his arm and tugged on it. didn't he realize that he had a person right here that truly cared for him? that wouldn't just playfully flirt and then proceed to fuck someone else?

baby, why were you so blind?

chapter four: [choco milk]
[ pov: jeongin ]

minho came back with two milks in his hands, followed by hyunjin who had two milks as well, causing a smile to spread out on my face. did he bring some for himself and me too?

but no.
"yeri look! hyunjin also bought two milks for you so you can choose one from us each!"

i stared at hyunjin absentmindedly. he didn't look happy with this. minho must've misunderstood something. god, minho was my best friend as well but he just wasn't right for my hyunjinnie. he didn't know how to love him.

yeri had picked two milks and then minho had swapped the one he was left with with hyunjin's. of course, he had to let his fingers brush hyunjin's hand.

my day had been ruined. was hyunjin even aware of my existence?? i angrily snatched the choco milk from his hand and drank it myself. hyunjin sucked ass. and minho too. and yeri too.

chapter five: [kiss scene]
[ pov: jeongin ]

i was watching hyunjin work, again. he just looked super hot being so focused on filming. but i could feel he was uneasy, struggled with keeping the camera steadily on minho and yeri.
i knew he was jealous.
and i was jealous of him being jealous.

i was busy staring at him before i realized what he had done. he had pushed himself in between the couple, ruining the scene for everyone. oh hyunjinnie, what were you doing?

i was so worried and stuck in my head that i didn't realize all the things which were happening until hyunjin's lips clashed onto minho's.

it felt like someone had stabbed a knife deeply into my chest and let it stay there. i gasped for breath, shocked, disappointed, anxious, running away from this awful scene as fast as i could. i didn't want to see this, i couldn't see this. hyunjin was running into something he didn't deserve. minho did not love him! i knew it.
i knew it because i knew how loving hyunjin felt like. i knew how it felt like to care for him so deeply, how it felt to miss him and love him and to want to dedicate my life towards him.

i knew it because i was in love with hwang hyunjin.

chapter six: [be patient with me]
[ pov: jeongin ]

i stopped running, breathlessly, sitting down on the ground, leaning against a wall. i wasn't even on the school grounds anymore; i was far away from what had hurt me but the pain had stayed.

i buried my face in my hands, pulling my knees close to my chest. i had cried over this boy so often. but never as intensely as right now.

my whole body was shivering, i flinched as i felt a soft hand on my shoulder.
"hey, are you alright?", someone said, speaking quietly, almost as if them being too loud could break me like glass. judging by the voice it was a girl.

i shook my head, sobbing, not caring whether anyone saw me in this desperate state or not. i had other things to worry about.

"i should've just told him.", i sobbed, "i had waited because i thought he'd realize how much i care for him soon enough. but he never did. and now he is with him.."

i was breathing heavily, my own cries shaking my chest each time.

the girl hesistated before answering although i had just been talking to myself while sitting down next to me. "maybe, if he didn't appreciate your love and care, he doesn't deserve your love? you're not made for each other if he is not seeing you as deeply as you see him. why would you give someone your all if they don't return any of it and give it to someone else instead?"

i kept on crying but looked up at her face. my guess was that she had thai roots, her hair was died in a bright pink and she had dark brown, warm eyes. "i'm mae by the way, jeongin."

i didn't know how she knew my name but i ended up leaning my head against her shoulder and crying even heavier.

hyunjin had torn my heart apart without even noticing. without even caring. without even seeing me although i had been his best friend for years.

[a/n: this hurt me xD]