Destined to Be

Chapter Seven: Question

Chapter Seven: Odd Questions

‘’If terror falls upon your bed, and sleep no longer comes; remember all the words I said.’’ – The Fray

I don’t think I will ever get used to holding hands with someone, let alone with a guy I barely know.  Yet, a part of me feels as if I am already used to the act, my physical self has no qualms with it, it’s just the fact that I feel like I’m going against myself.

 I have always believed that rushing into things won’t get anyone anywhere, and although I know Dylan and I aren’t rushing per se, a part of me feels like we are.  I mean how long are you supposed to be friends with a person before you take part in these little intimate gestures like holding hands or hugging for a long time and saying goodbye with a kiss on the cheek?

Or, maybe I’m over thinking.  Maybe my lack of experience in anything to do with guys, or the fact that I have had some experience with them but they aren’t necessarily events I’d like to even think about is affecting me.

Oh God.

I always knew I had some sort of psychological issues with myself, but I just never knew it would progress this far.  Fuck I really need to get a life.

~*~

So, apparently whilst I’ve been driving myself crazy with worry over the simple act of holding hands, Dylan had been watching me intently.

Stuck in my own world of self-induced confusion I didn’t realise we had already reached my room.  Both of those big warm hands captured mine, his thumb drawing invisible patterns on the back on mine, whilst those green eyes locked on mine waiting, ever so patiently.  Looking into those orbs I found myself blushing, and I quickly looked down at our feet.

‘’I’m sorry.’’ The fact that I was biting my bottom lip in order to regain some sense of composure meant that my words came out as a soft mumble, but I didn’t have to worry about Dylan not being able to hear me.  I doubt he would ever not hear me, and I’m not just talking about his werewolf hearing.  There’s just something about him that makes me feel content.  I feel so happy knowing that there is at least one person that will always listen to me.

Sighing, he pressed his lips to the top of my head, lingered for a moment and rested his chin on my head. His arms wound around my body, his taller frame engulfing my own.  ‘’I hate when you apologise to me.’’

Is it unusual that I felt ashamed of myself, because of what he said, because as soon as the word ‘’hate’’ left his mouth I felt my heart clench in disappointment.  I know I could have said anything else to him, or even asked him why he felt so strongly about it, but in typical Andrea fashion, I said what I could only think off.

‘’I’m sorry.’’

I felt my chest constrict once again, immediately regretting my poor choice of words.  Pulling back from me slightly, Dylan tilted my head up to look at him, but the stubborn side of me couldn’t bring myself to look at him.  I doubt I would even know what is truly wrong with me, but that didn’t matter at this point in time, for at this moment I seemed to have let down the one person I doubted would ever feel something as disappointment towards me.

‘’Rea…’’ His gruff voice called out to me, but I just felt incompetent. 

Actually, I always knew I was incompetent, but a part of me always hoped that it wouldn’t deter my chances of achieving happiness.  A part of me wanted to ask him all the questions I so desperately needed answers to, but all that came out was; ‘’I don’t know what to say to you.’’

A soft growl rumbled in Dylan’s chest, and he ran a hand through his hair, leaving the spot in which it rested on my side cold.  Even though I refused to look up at him I could feel he was staring at me intently and it was seconds before he replied ‘’what do you mean?’’

Sighing, I tilted my head back to look into his eyes, ‘’I know your hiding something from me, but I don’t know why and I want to know what it is, ‘cause at the moment it’s just driving me a bit crazy.’’

Arms wound around my waist again, fingers subtly pressing into my back ‘’what do you want to know?’’

A thousand different questions passed through my mind, each one after the same thing, mates.  Yet, at the same time I didn’t want to ask him about it.  I felt too scared to ask him, in case I found out I was reading too much into everything.  So I stood in the middle ground.

Biting my lips nervously, my breathing paused for a second, ‘’what am I too you Dylan?’’

I don’t if it was my brain over reacting to the whole situation, but I felt time slow down for just a moment before everything started passing by in a blur.  I felt my body being scrunched close to Dylan’s as my feel left the ground. Our faces level with one another, his smouldering, fighting with his wolf, he managed to open the door and shut it within seconds.

Whilst holding me up, he pushed me against the door, a deep growl passed his lips and I could feel the rumble of it within my own chest.  Dylan’s eyes were no longer the familiar emerald orbs, they were dark and rather sinister, the depth of their darkness sending a tingling shivers all over my body.

Feeling my shiver, Dylan let out a low growl, his canines extended and he grinned at me.  His eyes continued to hold my gaze, I felt as if I were going to be his meal, but strangely enough I didn’t feel scared.  I felt rather excited.

‘’Do you want to know what you are to me?’’  Even his voice changed, it sounded more rough and gravely.

The quick change in him almost made me forgot my catalytic question, but the reminder of it made me snap out of it, I quickly nodded. Letting out a soft breath, I made sure I kept my eyes locked on his unfamiliar ones.

‘’I don’t want to be used.’’

~*~

I’m sorry. I’m going to try to upload more often, and I decided to set a date as to when I’m going to upload so you guys will know. The next chapter will be up on 9/12/13

Thank you for reading, it means a lot to me :3

-       Sasha Andrea :3 x