Stepbrother | ✔︎

33 | quiddity

quiddity [ quid•idd•ity ]
n. the essence of something

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"So, let me get this right-Angelo is not your father, but Valentino is your brother, well, half-brother?" I asked, raising a brow as his head sat perched on my boobs.

My hands were playing in his hair, massaging his scalp with my fingertips. His eyes were shut, but I knew he was wide awake.

"My father's name was Roberto. He's who brought us into the mafia world. My mother met him in Italy where he brought her into the dark underground world. At first, she was hesitant, but she knew that she loved him-she stayed. As we grew older, we were treated like princes. We never saw Roberto much, and Angelo wasn't in the picture at all for Valentino. Luckily for us, our mother was always there," he told me. I continued to play in his hair as he spoke with his eyes still shut up from the world.

"Valentino is a lot older than I am. Sometimes, my father would take him, and he used to show him the life that he wanted him to take over one day. Everything my brother knows, he learned from my father. Your father, Sean, and mine were once best friends. The alliance they had was so strong that it turned to friendship. No one dared bother the Russian mafia because the Italian mafia would help them, and vice versa," he said before continuing.

"This was before Roberto had met my mother. Sean wanted her so bad. He would flirt, but my mother was all about loyalty. After having me, and learning that she was pregnant with another, he grew even more jealous of my father. He was so jealous to the point he groped her one day while he was over at our house. She immediately told my father and he broke off everything with that man.

"That didn't stop his mindset of, 'if I can't have her, no one will'. He came into our home knowing when our father was in his study with me, telling me all there is to know about this business," he stated. I stayed quiet as tears began to fall from my eyes silently. His voice was shaky as he let out a breath before continuing, "He raped my mother in front of my brother. He jumped my father until he bled out. My brother took care of me for months before Angelo finally came. Imagine a young boy taking care of an infant. He raised me, my brother, and he took over my fathers business, making sure to never trust a soul."

I choked back a sob as I listened. His words hurt me so much, and guilt couldn't help but coax out of me. That man did this to them.

"I thought you were in charge," I say, managing to find my voice.

"Valentino came up with that. He wanted to be better than my father and not make the same mistakes. Saying that I'm the boss, will confuse our enemies. If I die, they would think that our mafia is done for. What they don't realize is that if I die, they're only killing themselves," he said.

"I don't want you to die," I whisper. He opens his eyes, finding mine even in the dark. I stare into his eyes as the pad of his thumb came up to wipe my tears.

"I want you to know that I don't blame you for the actions of Sean. I know who you are, and I knew it from the moment I first saw you. Your innocence was so pure; very different from what your mother and father had," he said.

I chose to ignore his words. It didn't change the fact that I slept in the same house with the man that murdered a whole family. The blood of a murderer was still circling throughout my body. I didn't even know my fathers name was Sean, or the fact that I'm Russian.

"Did he name me after your little sister as a way to relieve his disgusting fascination of your mother?" I asked him, crying as the words change from my mouth.

"I believe so," he said. This causes the sob that I've holding back to rip out of me.

"I want to change it now. I want to change my name. I-I- I didn't know. I mean, my father told me that it meant beautiful or something like that. He said that was why he named me Orabella. He lied just like everything else. I thought that since my mother was Italian-," my words stopped. More tears fell from my eyes as I began to connect the dots.