Rose #9//Lil Peep

#55: Die Together

A/N: No edit, I thought I'd get this chapter up as soon as I could.

Next day, 1:01 PM

Peeling myself off the couch, I looked to see Gus sleeping. On the coffee table, there was half finished plates of food and a number of empty glasses from the smoothies we had.

A sudden movement came from behind me, looking over, it was my dad putting on his coat. My heavy eyes and sleepy state of being made me appear unruffled by the trouble I caused.

"Your mom called," he started, "She's expecting you back."

My no response attitude only aggravated him, "Amelia!"

But also, the reality of my situation was setting in, and I knew there was going to be consequences.

"I know!" I spat, not looking in his direction as I started putting on my shoes.

"I'm assuming you guys need money to get back."

Never mind his words, I was more angry at him for keeping Jessica's death a secret all these years, "Why didn't you tell me about Jessica? You knew how much she meant to me."

"Did your mother tell you?" He scoffed, pointing his tone in a stern force of hate.

"I found Jessica's memorial pamphlet on her desk, last week."

"Maybe she wanted you to find it, you know how she is."

"I don't care, why didn't you tell me?— Dad!"

"You were too young! Jessica and I agreed!"

"But I'm older now, I would've understood!"

"I was waiting!"

"Waiting on what!"

"The right time."

"With you, there's never a right time, you're hardly here!"

But he avoided, "Make sure you call housekeeping, Ms. Carter is out of town."

"Dad!" I pleaded as he walked out the door.

By such an impulse, I grabbed for the glass vase on the table beside me and threw it to the door. It turned to shambles, with the pieces of glass scattered.

It was Gus who got up and wrapped his arms around me. I was in such a rage that I forced him off me.

—

In the hours we sat on the train, I made up scenarios in my head and feared all of them. But also, at the same time, I didn't regret anything up to this point. In a sense, seeing Jessica's grave took away all false hopes I built up in my head.

Before knowing about her death, I had a plan, one that I formulated over the years and it would only cross my mind every now and then. It was to gradually sell things, hide the money in the vent, and deposit money from my dad's bank account then leave, to find her.

There was even a time, I imagined Gus at my side, the entire way— but that would immediately fade, being that we hadn't seen each other in years. I guess, I was also holding onto the plans we drew in a coloring book.