Still Remembering

CH. 12

TYSON'S POV:

  "Hello?" JT's sleepy voice said over the phone.
  "Hey when you gonna be home I need to talk to you."
  "I'll be in a few minutes let me just tell Jana I'm leaving."
  "Jana? Really?" I could feel the anger rising in my body. We hadn't even broken up and she had already run crying to him.
  "Tyson, don't even think that. She called me last night to help her with you. She wanted someone she knew would be able to see both sides. Stay there I'll be home in 10 minutes." I nodded knowing he couldn't see me and sat down on the couch waiting for him to get home. Sure enough he was walking through the door 10 minutes later. He grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge and then came and sat down next to me.
  "I really fucked up didn't I?" JT shook his head.
  "Why were you blaming her Tyson? You and I both know it wasn't her fault." I shrugged.
  "I was upset about losing, but I think I knew I had been a dick to her for the last week and I felt like I was being too much for her and she was going to leave me."
  "So you decided to give her a little push out the door or what was going through your mind there?"
  "Honestly I don' t know. I don't want to lose her, but I think how I feel about her scares me too. Its way more than it was when we were younger and that scares me."
  "You don't want to lose her, but you are pushing her away Tyson. It's okay to be scared of how you feel, but you should face those fears not run from them or you're going to regret it."
  "Wait, did she say she was going to break up with me?" JT sighed.
  "I don't know Tyson. We didn't talk very much about it. She told me what happened and then went to bed. It's not my place to tell you where her head is at, if you wanna know then you need to talk to her. It needs to come from her mouth." I nodded, knowing what he said was right.
  "I'm going to give her a couple of days then I'll call her and see if she will talk to me."

JANA'S POV:

 It had been 2 days since I left Tyson's house and he had just texted me asking if I could meet him for coffee and talk. I had been in constant communication with JT to see how Tyson was doing and JT asking me if I had made a decision on what I wanted and honestly I hadn't. I was hoping by seeing and talking to Tyson today it would help put things into place for me. I really loved Tyson, but I knew what I could handle in life and what I couldn't.
I walked into the coffee shop a few minutes before we were set to meet up and ordered a coffee before finding a seat in the back. I watched as Tyson walked in a few minutes later and ordered his coffee before sitting down across from me. He looked like shit. His eyes were red and puffy from not sleeping and his hair was a mess like he'd run his fingers through it 1000 times. He took a drink of his coffee before he looked at me with sad eyes.
  "I'm so sorry Jana. I know none of this was your fault and I know I was treating you like shit and acting like the biggest asshole ever. I never wanted to put you in this place. I was upset."
  "So you decided to hurt me too? Tyson I get being hurt from a loss or being upset by a loss or whatever, but you can't take it out on everyone else. I love you, but I'm not going to stay around and be your scapegoat just so you have someone to pin the losses on."
  "You love me?" he said, eyes wide. I hadn't realized I had said it.
  "I do. So much. But I also love myself enough that I will not hesitate to leave if I think you're treating me unfairly, which you were."
  "I get it. I do. I am sorry, I promise I will never do it again. I may get upset about games but I promise you I will never take it out on you again. Leave it at the door."
  "I'm not saying you can't come to me and vent Tyson. You've had losses throughout the season and you always came over and we talked about them when you wanted to and you vented and then let it go. That's how it should be. I know this was a big one, so I would have even been okay with the moodiness for a couple days."
  "I totally get it. I'm so sorry." he grabbed my hand and brought it to his lips and kissed my knuckles. I smiled at him before finishing my coffee.
 It was late. Tyson and I had gone back to my house after the coffeehouse so we could be alone for awhile and we had made up. Several times. Now we're laying in my bed cuddled up watching the lightning hit the mountains behind my house and listening to the rain fall. I had my head on his chest and he was playing with my hair. I was almost asleep when he leaned down and kissed the top of my head.
  "I love you too by the way." he whispered and I fell asleep with a big smile on my face.