Spent most of the day reading 'Good Vibes, Good Life' and admittedly, Jon was right. It does mess with your brain a little bit, puts things into perspective, thank god for books like these. I think I'm developing something for self-help books, perhaps they aren't so bad after all, keeps me wired in the right course.
All of a sudden, whilst digging into dinner, Jon dropped by my room which startled me because it was so unexpected, not to mention my room was in no proper state to receive visitors. Amenities were strewn everywhere and my luggage buried under a heap of souvenirs and apparel. Still have to get that sorted out.
"Your room looks like a mess. Not a tidy person, are you?" Jon peered and took a furtive glance into my room from the door, very intrusive. He was carrying a bottle of wine. Fancy.
"Shhhh, Come in." I hissed. What was I supposed to do? Had to invite him in somehow. "Make yourself at home, find a seat. No worries, just move the things aside and sit, I'll deal with them later." I scuttled to the bathroom to wash my mouth, only to find my mouth had ketchup stained all over it. Face grew flushed in no time.
"I brought over some wine just in case you fancied a drink!" Jon shouted.
"Thanks."
Admittedly, I was so nervous. I needed to entertain him, felt obligated to ensure his spontaneous visit was worthwhile, got to make him laugh, make him joyous. Definitely a cat on hot bricks, found myself repeatedly washing my face , willing some courage to face present situation. I think I broke a sweat, and my heart was racing at wild speed. Why was I feeling this way? The anxiety was immense. Asserting an air of confidence, I stumbled out of the toilet, nearly slipping on the bathroom mat.
"Who are those flowers from?"
"Oh from my boss! Her birthday's coming up and she's getting a new bouquet soon. So she decided to dump me her old bouquet."
"Oh." So nonchalant.
"Can you imagine she decided to do that, midway through the business conference? She has a perfect sense of timing." I was all jitters.
"For a moment I thought you had a girlfriend."
"Like I got time for that." I chortled. The idea of a partner is crazy, commitment scares me.
Ended up discussing about our days together when we were younger. I speak as if we are in retirement. He was oddly reminiscent of those days, said he was feeling so bothered lately because his parents are pushing him to get linked with a girlfriend, probably his Mum. Mothers tend to be a little concerned over ensuring their offspring get married and start a family of their own and if they had a boy for a child, that he fulfills all these and establishes himself properly. Stereotypes, but pretty factual in some instances.
He reminded me how the two of us still manage to converse as if no time had gone by. It's a wonder because we were so close in college, we talked almost everyday at the time, his studies were satisfactory, mine weren't. Grades were bollocks and parents never stopped nagging. He was popular, I was private and taciturn. Our personalities are so varied. We went for more than a decade without speaking to each other, and then he turns up again in my life and it is as if nothing has changed. Silence ensued.
"It's funny ain't it?"
"What is?"
"The way we were and now, here we are... You know..."
Could tell he was beginning to avoid my gaze. Silence.
"Matthew?"
"What?"
"Can I use your toilet?" He dashed in. Something was odd.
And then he suddenly said he had to go, in the midst of our discourse. Weird. He just said he had to go and buzzed out of the room, which came as a surprise, no opportunity to even ask what was wrong. Dropped him a text but hasn't replied. Probably felt unwell, it happens. I get migraines pretty often, things get bleak and I feel sick. I blame Mum and the genes.
