CHAMPIONS

Episode Three: The Crush

Symone:

Whisk out to sea, I felt grabbed up from the water immediately becoming dry standing on a beach. The sand sucks me into a torture room with Valerie burning me with cigarettes. Closing my eyes, brought me back to the beach with my hands holding Rodney's hands. Looking so deeply into his eyes, brown and convincing. Looked in his eyes seeing what would become of me and him. Together then falling deep in love.

Looking in to my mirror on my makeup bag on the bus and seeing deep bags under my eyes, let's say I didn't get any sleep because of that dream, and it's been recurring over the past few weeks. What does it mean? Valerie has been bothering me, constantly talking about my outfits I've chosen for that day by saying at a shirt "Did fit me" in a sarcastic way. Like adding salt to a wound, it hurt what she was saying but when staying after school with Rodney, it would fix every crack in my reflection of my outer self. I was damaged every day, but Rodney was and is my medicine, my two Aleve a day, keeping me going to West Oaks. And my new found friend Rain was helping me stay positive. Told Rain about each day, each confrontation I had with Valerie did help me vent but, coming home I usually drop everything walking into my room, crying quietly, because even though I had a friend like Rain that went through basically the same thing, I was still being dragged through the mud because of her. I was getting quiet and quieter in 1st period, there was nothing to say when it came to Valerie. Rodney acted like he didn't hear her by talking to the guy in our group and Jazmine didn't help because she was too busy "being a friend" to Valerie then even listen to my side of my story.

I felt lost until every lunch and last period of the day. When tutoring Rodney, he would flirt with me, I wanted to "Cruz". But every chance I got I ended up saying "We should focus on reading" or "I though you're with Valerie." Saying the Valerie thing usually got him to hush up, because I knew and he knew he is feeling her. I don't blame him. She's slim, naturally pretty, and has her daddy's credit card in pocket. But he sees what she does to me, she not nice, not even a little bit. Anytime she wants to, she breaks down my wall, brick by brick. One day, Rodney told me what Valerie was to him. That she is a girl that wants to be with him. That's all he said, didn't explain, just ran out the library as usual. Which I knew it was to keep me from his friends. I would see him hug Valerie and talk to her with his arm around her shoulders. Rodney would just touch my hands or stand really close to me, but never hug me. As if he was trying to remind me that I wasn't the girl he wants. Sometimes he would run out the library so quick that he wouldn't even read Romeo and Juliet with me or do his homework in English either. Once I even did his homework for Algebra too. He would never let us leave the library in the school, it felt like he was playing me, but I still would stay after school with him. Because he does kind of treat me like "One of the guys" I was able to figure out he didn't like Valerie for her money but more so on her looks because he has money of his own. Rodney's dad is a retired NBA player, and he wants to follow in his dad's footsteps. He told me it's hard to do it, because his dad wants Rodney to be better than him in basketball. But it's difficult, his dad is one of the greats basically. That what Rodney told me while looking down at his phone. At first, I didn't know why Rodney was telling me these things about his past, present, and possible future. Being around Rodney gave me that feeling I haven't had before, he makes me feel important, smart, and beautiful. Then I realized that he might be feeling me, I was falling for him, and at least he's with me. I would remind myself that all the time. At least his with me.

Arrived at lunch, completely drained. The day before, Valerie spent the whole period reminding everyone how much she loved her new Michael Kors bag. Rubbing it basically in my face, when I pushed it out my way to see the homework on the board, she says "Man she got KFC chicken grease on it". She dusted off her purse then turning back to her friends as if nothing even happened.