Kudos of Mafia

'VIII'

Senor, with a state of conflict in his mind and a tired aged body, approached towards his drawer. He lifted the letter from the corner side of the drawer and continued exploring the answers to his very questions.

(continuing the letter....)

I know you are amused and speechless at the same time getting this letter from me after fifteen years. It might come to you as a sudden surprise but let me say you that everything has its own specific time and space. And the very first question you might be asking is: why? Why after all these years? I can predict the frustration you have been breeding in your sole solitude. But as a matter of fact, we both knew it was coming down the line but yet tied our hands and couldn't avoid it. I know. I know you could have been the savior of our broken lives. I know you had the reach to end all the consequences the day I had insisted to shift to America but your vision couldn't rise above your dumbass ambition that ruined our family for good. It was on my part to decide whether to let go of all the things that occurred to us or not. You know it.

Senor things have changed. We aren't the same one we used to be yesterday. No can deviate from the law of changes. We both are a mere slave of time and it was us who had to serve time accordingly but we failed or I better say you failed us. You decided to follow your path and I did mine. Aren't we even? What a coincidence it has been from both of us.

You know Senor, I miss my father to this day. I never got to see my mother. I never knew what it felt like to be loved by a mother. My father raised me and my sister with everything he had in him. The man did what it takes for a father to raise two daughters on his own. He never left any gaps for our care and compromise with his life for ours.
And you know it what you did to that man, I miss till this very day.

Maybe you didn't want any of it. Whatever fell upon us could have been avoided with a choice and you had that choice but you reversed it. Maybe.
It never ends, the cycle of 'what if' repeats time and again in spite of the endeavor to dispatch it from our life.

I can smell that anxious Senor who wants the answer of; why? Why now?

I guess I won't be able to put it to you in the right words. There always existed this obligatory burden within me to let you know that I have moved on with my life but I could never within these years. I tried to pen you a few letters but I frankly I just wanted to erase the past I didn't want to live. I couldn't rise above my hate and anger for you. And here am I finally overcoming my anger writing down this letter for you.

It might sound somewhat of a terrible pain but to let you know, I found a guy after I left you. I could never forget what happened but this guy came in my life as a healing wand to heal my scarred heart left by you.
Senor, you know it. You have always wanted me to live a life I desperately wanted. While leaving you back then, you yourself put your final words suggesting me to start a new life. It doesn't mean I found any sorts of limitations in your love but I couldn't live a life with a lie that you cared for us. You discovered a magical love with your ambition that made you blind towards your family.

Now you have known the purpose of this letter. And you might be scratching yourself on why I mentioned about the night you went to get me grilled fish? I just wanted you to remember the possibilities we held back then which got torn into pieces. I can lie to you but can't with god. I won't say I didn't share a journey of my life with you. I had memories that I would love to lock down to the depth of my unconscious mind but you know it's not possible now.

I hope you live a better life than you did in the past. We learn from our mistakes and hope you learned by this time even though u couldn't back then. I am delighted with my loved ones nearing to a euphoric life than I ever did.

Your well-wisher,
Agatha

************************************

The tears that accumulated for all these years in the eyes of Senor started crumbling like the dried leaves in winter. The knowings of letter Struck Senor, unlike anything. He couldn't control himself but cry leaning against his hands on the arms of chairs. The destiny his conscious mind predicted came to be true but Senor never imagined it could be that bitter of all.

Bruno rushed from the kitchen to the bedroom, "What happened, sir? Is everything all right?"

Senor in a calm and composed manner hiding the letter under the cushion of the chair. "I am fine Bruno, just the old memories."

"May I bring you a glass of water?"

"No, I am good. You can continue to prepare dinner, will go out for some fresh air."

Bruno in a tremendous shock, returned to the kitchen wondering why Senor cried which was something that never happened before.

Senor stood up from his chair and headed his way to the balcony with a heart that just lost its heartbeat.