Loving Our Journey - (MewGulf, Canon Compliant)

Touch Me, Baby I

Mew's PoV

'Oh! Why didn't you tell me that you were coming?' I asked, scratching my head.

'Because you would have told me that you were feeling well already, and it wasn't necessary,' he said humorously.

'That's true.  But, since you're already here, I suppose you should come in,' I said trying to hide a smile. 

'You're so kind, khun phi,' he said sarcastically, and I couldn't avoid smiling broadly anymore. 

'Yesterday, when I was discharged from hospital I told you not to worry.'

'Yeah, about that. I talked to your mother early this morning  and she told me that your family would be busy today.  She even asked me to take care of you.  How I am supposed to ignore my mother-in-law's request?' He said cheekily.  I gaped at him puzzled and wondered, 'Since when has he become so bold?'

He noticed my bewilderment and smiled. 'I can tell you are surprised, but I'm confident that I already have your mom and your sister's blessing,' He said teasing me. I couldn't help laughing.  The thought of my family accepting me and Gulf in a relationship made me happy. 

'The thing that surprises me the most is you waking up early in the morning!' I teased back. He pouted and whined 'Oh, phi! Actually, it wasn't so early,' which made me laugh even harder.  He blushed and tried not to laugh himself.

'Sit down at the table, I bought porridge for you.  How are you feeling? Have you taken your medicine?' He said changing the topic, while he unwrapped the porridge and put it in a bowl.  He placed it in front of me and started opening the drawers until he found a spoon.  Then he took a glass and poured some water.

'Are you drinking enough water, phi? I remember the doctor said that you were a little dehydrated,' he said frowning.  An immense tenderness invaded my whole body.  I was amazed of how sweet and caring this boy could be.  I was so used to being the one taking care of others that I didn't know how to react to all this softness.  I felt so moved that although I could spend a century trying to repay all his kindness, I was sure that in my heart it still wouldn't be enough.  When you are the one who's always giving, sometimes you forget that you can also be in the receiving end once in a while.  I've always been a pleaser.  I've always been the one who pursues the other person, the one who chases and makes the efforts.  This was a total new scenario for me. He was trying to woo me and to be honest, I was already swooning.  He got me, which terrified me and captivated me at the same time.  I was thrilled, elated and grateful.  It was intoxicating and I knew that I wouldn't be able to keep my walls up for long.  He was like a rushing river that had arrived to wash all my fears away.  

'Phi.  The water. Are you drinking water?' He repeated softly, bringing me back from my thoughts.  I took the glass and sipped the water, just to indulge him.  He flashed me a wonderful smile, so I ate in silence, with a thousand pros and cons flooding my mind.  Mostly pros, but  there was a con that was paralyzing.  I couldn't forget the heartache I had undergone in the past for loving the wrong man.  The fear, the pain, the shame.  I couldn't allow my heart to make this decision, unless I was ready to put at risk my career and my reputation again.  If the history repeated itself, this time I would be ruined for life.  Not only would I be out of the industry, but also I would be lost forever.  What I felt for Gulf was so much stronger than I had felt before for anyone else.  So, 'how much stronger would it be the pain?' I wouldn't be able to bear it. 

I felt that I couldn't eat another bite, so I left the spoon and sipped a little more water.   Gulf seemed satisfied.  He handed me the pills and I swallowed them obediently with a gulp of water.  'You're such a good patient, khun phi!' He said merrily.  'Now, let's go to bed.'

I turned to look at him in sheer panic and he bursted out.  He cackled hysterically while I felt  like an idiot.  I could feel my anxiety peaking again, and the emotion filling my chest.  I tended my hand towards him to calm myself through his touch, but he smirked smugly and put his hands on his lap. He looked at me defiantly in the eye and waited. I stared at him, hurt and confused, but I didn't dare to ask.  I wasn't ready to have that conversation yet.  

'Now let's put YOU to bed,' he said playfully. 

'I'm not tired,' I lied.

'I don't believe you.  You are working too much and you are spending all your free time studying for your master's degree or playing games. You are eating like a bird and sleeping just a couple of hours. You didn't take care of yourself properly, and now your body is telling you what your brain doesn't want to see. You are making me angry,' he said with annoyance. 'If you don't rest today, I'll tell the producers to cancel tomorrow's fan meeting.'

'But I don't want to sleep,' I said still hurt and ashamed.

'Yeah, well. I don't want to work on Sundays, but it is what it is,' he said grinning and he stood up to escort me to my bedroom.  I figured that if I went to bed as he wanted he would leave soon, so I complied.  He helped me to lie and he even tucked me in.  I was perplexed.  He was treating me like a child.  I used all my willpower to avoid touching him and I closed my eyes to fake that I was sleeping and make him leave.