The Pensieve and the Potions Master

A Flash into Snape's Past

Harry felt sick as he watched his father torment the young, pathetic looking Snape. He now wished he hadn't let his curiosity get the best of him, he should have left the pensieve alone in Snape's absence. Would he ever look at his father the same way? But then he thought of his mother, and how she had tried to stop him, to help the defenseless Snape. He admired her for her courage and her sense of right and wrong. Still, this did not make him feel better about James, about his father...

"Enough!" Snape bellowed. "You will not repeat what you saw to anybody!" He dragged Harry from the pensieve and flung him across the room and into a shelf precariously lined with potions and other objects suspended in liquid. He was dangerously quiet for a moment, then said, "your lessons are at an end. Get out." But Harry did not leave. Snape pretended to ignore his presence and began replacing the spilt potions to their proper places without any real sense of order. He was beside himself with fury and his mind was clearly elsewhere.

"I want to know about my mother." Harry said suddenly. Snape grew red as he continued magically replacing things to the shelf, whether from anger or embarrassment, Harry did not know. Though the professor did not reply, Harry knew perfectly well that he had heard him. Harry cautiously spoke again: "Sirius has told me all about my father, but I hardly know a thing about my mum." After a pause, he said, "you knew her, didn't you? She tried to defend you from my dad." Then, remembering what he had seen in the pensieve, "you called her a mudblood." Snape raised his black eyes to meet Harry's green ones and his expression changed from hate and rage to sorrow. Confused, Harry asked, "why'd you say that? She was only trying to help. I'm not going to stand here and make excuses for my father, what he did was wrong, and I'm sorry. But my mother..."

"...was a kind woman," began Snape. "What I said to her that day was wrong and cruel and there is no excuse. It may have been the biggest mistake of my life." He no longer looked enraged at Harry for deliberately seeking out his worst memory. Instead, he looked hurt. Miserable, even. Snape suddenly straightened his position and startled Harry from his thoughts as well. "We'll resume your lessons next week, Potter. Same time." Harry was puzzled, since a minute ago he had demanded that Harry never return to his office, but he accepted this change and hurried from the cramped potions office.