Something to Believe In

CH 20: Straightedge Expansion

             Matt loses, as planned. We're up directly after his match, which means that he and Michelle end up standing together, to wait for her cue. I head out to the ring with Gallows and Serena. Gallows has the chair, Serena has the clippers, and I'm full of the fire to convert people. We set up in the ring, and I start calling out to everyone, both in the arena and outside of it, taunting them. "I'm straightedge, and that means I'm better than you! I don't poison my body with alcohol or drugs! I don't abuse myself like you sorry people out there. Rey Mysterio needs to join us, he needs to make the commitment to save himself before it's too late. We could do so much good..."

Michelle's music hits as I'm mid-sentence. I pause, looking up the ramp as she storms down. She stops outside of the ring and glares up at us, taking a microphone from one of the stagehands. "I'm sick of you idiots!" If I didn't know better, I would honestly think she's been drinking. She does a convincing job, swaying and slurring her words just enough. "All you ever do is talk, talk, talk! You talk about how much better than us you are. You babble about your silly little organization."

"Oh, Michelle McCool," I say, shaking my head, "you've been drinking, haven't you? What's the matter? Are you starting to realize that maybe your life isn't so flawless, after all?"

She stares up at me, then tries to climb into the ring. She nearly falls and Luke grabs her arm, hauling her up. She pulls back from him, then slides between the ropes and stands in the ring with us. "What do you know about it?" she asks, getting in my face. We're nearly nose to nose.

I take a step back, fanning my face. "Your breath is a hundred proof," I tell her. "If they were smart, they'd throw you out of here right now."

She smirks at me. "You're afraid of me, aren't you?"

"Of course not," I say. "But your breath is rancid with alcohol and you're obviously impaired right now. Maybe you ought to go home and sleep it off." I pause. "Or maybe that's why you came up here. Maybe you've come to your senses and you want to join the straightedge society and accept me as your savior?" She snorts. "Luke Gallows did it, and he was in a worse place than you are, Michelle McCool. He was drowning in a sea of drugs and alcohol, and the people who should have cared to save him didn't. Come on, Michelle. Did you come to be saved?"

She stares at me for a long moment, then whispers into her microphone, "Yes." The crowd erupts.

"She has come to be saved!" I shout, smiling. "She's another one who has seen the light!" I motion for Gallows to set up the chair, and he does. Serena brings me the clippers, then maneuvers Michelle into the chair. I kneel down before the chair, and she looks down at me, her hair hiding her smile from the cameras. "If you really want to be saved, you need to make a sacrifice. Raise your hands with us and pledge to be straightedge and then we will shave your head."

She looks up, a hesitant expression on her face now. "My hair?"

"It's impure. I need to know you mean it. I need to know that you want to get clean, to no longer be under the influence of alcohol. I need you to pledge to us tonight that you will take me as your savior, that you will no longer poison your body and cloud your mind with harmful substances. I need to know that you're willing to live the straightedge lifestyle." By now, the three of us are raising our hands in the pledge.

She chews on her lip, then nods, raising her hands along with the rest of us. "Yes. I want... this."

I smile at her. Luke claps his hands down on her shoulders. It looks like he's holding her, though I can see that his hands are resting lightly. I pull out the clippers and turn them on. "Then let's make you straightedge, Michelle." She closes her eyes, and I carefully work the clippers through her hair. Even knowing she would go through with it, it seems weird to actually be doing it. The blonde locks fall to the floor in a pile as I run the clippers over her hair. "It'll grow back," I mutter, well away from the microphones.

She smiles and opens her eyes to look at me. "It's just hair," she mutters, so only I will hear.

When the pile of hair on the stage is complete, we "let" her up. "Look!" I call to the audience. "Another one saved! Another person who will no longer be subjected to the evils of alcohol and the horrible ruin that drugs and cigarettes can make of your life! We've brought another soul into the straightedge society, and we're not going to stop until everyone is converted!"

With the crowd booing, I jump down from the ring and take Serena's hand. Luke helps Michelle down, mindful of the fact that she's still "drunk." He's got a good grip on her hand as we head backstage. Hardy meets us just beyond the entry. "Wow," he says, reaching out to run a hand over her head. "Nice hair, Michelle."

She smirks. "I need a shower. It's itchy as hell."

"See you in catering?" I ask.

She grins. "I wouldn't miss it for the world tonight."