Divulgence: A Poetry Collection

A Ruminant Soliloquy

They told me to pick my poison, but what if it was another soul's meat

It's been a while since I've felt this feeling, where my fears and my roles meet

I've been living as a sheep in wolves clothing, as a carp among sharks

I've come to see my moxie's mouldy and my heart's lost its spark

A chasm's forming where my heart was

My joy's dispersing like some chalk dust

Self-deceptions where it's at, and self-destruction's looking backwards.

Whilst I reflect upon the things I've done

I've come to see I've failed to shun the ways of scum

I've become numb and glum, with a blistered tongue

Because I've sipped on seething sacrilege in its bona fide form

And so the scorn that I held upon a stranger's shadow

has returned to tear my tendons, break my bones, and slurp the marrow

But there's no morrow when you follow those that borrow from Apollo,

Pagan's harrow, whilst they swallow all the sins that dwell in horror.

I have longed to be the stamen, free my pollen, pollinating

But the thing is fornicating is the same thing as betraying bonds that bind disciples' saving

Plus, mindless penetrating just cannot be elevating, even if it's satiating

For Lust's a son of Satan.

Expressing what I feel inside, can counteract the cyanide

That's dripping from the faceless husks and puppets strings with toxic dust

Each night as I drift to sleep, I realize I've dug too deep 

A peerless pit above. Beneath? 

The source of all my needless grief

Where all shall weep and gnash their teeth, in utter pain and disbelief.

Lest the damsel dons a diaper, don't think you can change her

Swine forever swig their sick so stay clear of their manger

Letting vicious vipers in your life's inviting venom,

And even then, a snake can only bite you if you let 'em

Still, their fangs are fearsome things, some piercing pass your denim;

Then coursing through your system and then shackling you like a felon.

Still, every day I'm dodging demons, which dash toward me madly

But trudging forward evermore, I face them fiercely, gladly. 

Velton Gooden Jr, (2018)