True Lies (Larry Stylinson)

Chapter 19

HARRY:

     I sat at the desk late one night. Louis shifted in his sleep from the bed and my head whipped in his direction to be sure he was still sleeping. He was. I turned back to the blank paper in front of me, holding a pen tightly in my hand until my knuckles turned white and became sore.

        Louis,

                There is no easy way to tell you this. I know you won't forgive me or believe me after you read this but know that I really am sorry for whatever the contents of this letter put you through. I know how important the truth is to you so I am writing this to give it to you. The whole truth.

        When you told me you were gay and that you loved me, I didn't know what to think. I didn't love you that way and it broke my heart that I couldn't give what you wanted. When me and Liam found you after you did what you did I made a decision. One that, looking back, I'm not entriley sure was right. When I told you I was gay and that I liked you more than a friend, I was lying. I thought that if I gave you the relationship you wanted you would get better. And I was right. You've been doing so much better Louis.

        Please don't think this means that I don't love you. I love you more than anything. While I was pretending I learned a lot about myself and what I wanted too. Everything I said about my mom and being there for you was true. All the times I told you I loved you. The kisses and hugs, the nights we stayed up in bed talking. They were real.

        Walking into this, I didn't think that I was like you. I realise now that I was wrong. I am gay. And I'm in love with you Louis. Please forgive me. I thought that I was doing the right thing by lying to you. I thought that you would die if I didn't. I was trying to save your life. I'm sorry. I love you.

                                                                                                                                                -Harry

     I looked at the words I carefully printed on the page and ripped it from the desk, wadding it into a ball and throwing it in the trashcan. I couldn't tell him with a letter. I would have to think of something else.

     "Harry?" someone whispered from behind me. I didn't need to look. I knew who it was.

"Yeah?" I asked.

"What are you doing? It's almost two in the morning." Louis asked, wrapping his arms around my shoulders from behind.

"Nothing. Let's go back to bed." I said, guiding Louis back to his side and pulling the blankets over him before climbing in next  and pulling him close to my chest.

***

LIAM:

     When I woke up the next morning I was sore. All over. My legs were like jelly and my head pounded. My back was tight. I ran my hands over my face and sat up, feeling a weight next to me. I turned and was met with the sight of Zayn sleeping next to me. I paled at the sight when I realized that neither of us were wearing clothes.

     And then I remembered. I remembered everything. The fight he had had with Niall, burning dinner and going out, Zayn getting drunk. The realization came ove rme like a wave and I was feeling light headed at the thoughts that swam through my clouded mind.

     I jumped when I felt Zayn stir next to me and sit up. He looked at me and a look of complete shock and regret flashed across his features before he quickly changed it to one of indifference when he noticed I was staring.

"Liam," he started, plaiyng with his fingers in his lap. "I don't know what to say." he said lowly.

"You don't have to say anything." I said, wanting nothing more than to fall into his arms and know where we stood. Did this make us a couple? He said it was over between him and Niall. 

     His phone rang next to us and he jumped to answer it.

"Hello?" he asked. "Yeah, I know... well you didn't have to just leave. How do you think I felt? This isn't easy for me either."  He sighed.  "Alright. I'll be there. I love you too." he said and hung up. I felt my face get hot and stared at the sheets as the tears blurred my vision. 

     I looked up when I felt a hand under my chin and saw a distorted image of Zayn before I blinked.

"I have to go." he said softly.

"Why?" I asked, already knowing the answer.

"Niall didn't go back home. He stayed in a hotel last night. He wants to talk." he hesitated before gettng up and slipping back into his pants and running his fingers through his hair. "Liam, I'm sorry..."

"No you're not." I spat. "You used me." The words tasted bitter on my tongue. 

"It wasn't like that." He reasoned.

"How was it then? You came to me when you got into a fight with your boyfriend and then you told me, 'It's over, I need you.' So you fucked me and now you're gonna leave as soon as he calls? That's exactly what happened! I was a one night stand. You're rebound. Whatevr you wanna call what you did doesn't change the act that you did it to get back at Niall. You don't love me." I was sobbing by then and Zayn stepped forward.

     "Don't. Don't touch me." I snapped, pushing him back. "Get dressed and get out of my house. Go back to your boyfriend." I cried and slammed the door in his face.

HARRY:

     I woke up the next morning to an empty bed next to me. I frowned and sat up, looking arond the room for Louis. Normally I had to wake him up.

"Lou?" I asked, coming downstairs. "Louis?" I asked after finding him at the table.

     He looked down at his lap. He was deathly still and didn't look at me or even acknowledge my presence in the room.

"Louis? What's wrong?" I asked, squatting down next to his chair. "Please tell me." I begged and wated for his answer, though it didn't come. Instead, he thrusted a piece of paper into my hands. "Wha-." I stopped, along with my heart when I realized what it was.

     "Louis, this isn't how I wanted you to find out." I said. "Please look at me."

"You didn't want me to find out at all did you?" he asked.

"No, Louis I wanted to tell you myself. I didn't mean for you to find this." I said, gesturing to the paper in my hands.

"Why would you do this? Are that sadistic?" He shouted, getting up and looking down at me.

"No. Did you read it?" I got up from the floor and stood in front of him. "I thought I killed you Louis. I thought what I was doing was right. I know that what we had started with a lie but what we had after that was real. I do love you the way you love me." I said.

"Get away from me. I trusted you when I came out to you and you betrayed that trust. You took advantage of that." he said, pushing me back and walking past me into the bedroom. He pulled n a pair of pants and a clean shirt before he took his wallet, phone and keys, stopming to the front door.

"No! You're not leaving until we talk about this!" I yelled, grabbing for his arm. He turned on his heels and swung. I was met with a deep smarting ache in my cheek and fell to the ground before vaguly hearing the door slam.

     A.N.- Sorry, I really ws gonna put some Ziam smut in there, but I chickened out at the last second and couldn't do it... SORRY.  :(  Also sorry for any typos. I need to get word so I wrote this with ghetto notepad.  :( :(