I Crash You

2 - The Blind Date

[Edited]

5 years later..

I made some steady round motion to my wine glass. My eyes followed the liquid inside going in circles as if they were amusing. Yes, much more interesting than the man across me, thank you.

He was cool, smart and well-groomed. I would date him if not for his squeaky bathtub duck nature. Oh yeah, the way he boasted about his business, grades and everything. They suck, it ain't smooth.

And yes, I had to be stuck here until his steak was done, which would take approximately another horrendous hour since he talked way too much like a fucked up glitched windows xp .exe error.

All because of that bitch, Amy. She had asked me for a favor, which was to be her freaking substitute for this blind date because she was gonna spend some quality time with her fucking boyfriend. Yeah, they're probably fucking for real right now. I couldn't reject the offer though, due to the fact that I really did owe her one, for ripping apart her favourite dress that was. But hey, it was just a piece of cloth with slutty strings of spaghetti attached on it, except spaghetti was better, by an abundance of margin lots.

As I scanned my surrounding for more entertainment while nodding my head, continuing my act as a broken doll like what I had been doing for the past hour, I luckily found one. I didn't know, but he seemed to be in the same situation as mine, judging from the way he pressed his lips thin, his impatient little taps of foot. He looked cool in his tuxedo which was fitted right to his chest, his jet black hair, his endearing grey eyes. Maybe because of my non-stop staring contest with his muscles, he glanced at me for a sec. I only raised my brow at him slightly.

He said a few words to who-was-supposedly-be-his-date then stood up. Nah, I didn't speak mouth movement cause I was a mute for that. That skinny piece of barbie stick dipped in mustard held him back though.

"Wait, you can't just leave me hanging like this. It's just been 5 minutes." Her voice was loud enough for me to hear. 5 mins? That's interesting.

"Sorry, please excuse me." He got out of her grip and walked away. Wait, was he coming this way?

"No, please," she held him again.

Awesome, my mind was finalized. I stood up.

"Umm.. Amy?" I heard Greg, the blabbered mouth in front of me said. Which I definitely don't care the slightest bit.

I halted that cool stranger's step by standing precisely in front of him, almost making him bump onto me. When the three pairs of pierced curious eyes were aimed at me, I took it as my cue.

"Baby.. I can't believe it's you." I touched his biceps.

Ouch, they were thicc.

"I still couldn't get over you. Please, let me explain. It was a misunderstanding. It really was. Give me a chance." I pleaded emotionally. I knew I had always been a great actress but right now, I only needed one more thing to complete my show. Get out tears, get the fucking out, please.

"Excuse me?" His eyebrows quirked.

"Oh, it must've been hard for you. It was too much. I know, I know it's still a traumatic event for you. But calm down, please, let me explain."

He opened his mouth, and nah. Before he could utter any word, I proceeded with my monologue drama.

"Okay, what about we talked about it at your place? Where we first kissed, spend the night, making love, all of our memories of love were held." Finally! There, slided my masterpiece, my crystal clear crocodile friggin' tears. I drew back my hand.

"Amy..?" Oh, shut up ducky. If you're speechless, just continue being speechless and shut the fuck up until forever ever after.

"Come on, baby." I snatched my clutch and dragged him to the elevator. My other hand grazed over my precious tear dramatically.

"What the fucking hell was that?" He said right when the elevator closed. I bet his soul had ditched him for a whole minute.

"Oh, shit. I hope my mascara is waterproofed." I tried to find my mirror mirror not on the wall. "It's new. First time trying. But, if not, I don't mind either, that would make it more dramatic, wouldn't it?" I rambled on. At last I found it and I knew it. Screwed my beginner's luck, they smeared. I looked like a dull panda.

"Hello?" He waved his hand exactly over my face.

"You bring a car?" I asked him instead.

"With my chaffeur."

"Great. Might as well call him now and make the scene more realistic."

"Look, lady. I-,"

"Look, mister. I know we were in the same boat, might as well make it meaningful." The lift door spread open. I tilted my head, signaling him to go first. He sighed and ruffled his hair messily as he walked out.

Ooh baby, that's what you call as natural in the divine nature.

A moment after we reached the double front door of the building, a black Mercedes ceased in front of us. As his chaffeur assisted him with his door, I skipped my way to the other door and hopped on.

"Sir," his driver said as he caught a glimpse of me through the mirror. I smiled and waved at him.

"Let's just go, Mr. Scott." He said tired.

"Okay." And the car departed.

"Our lovely Mr. Scott, just drop me off right at that corner, please."

"No, drop her at her place, Mr. Scott." He leaned back and closed his eyes.

"Aww, trying to be a gentleman, handsome guy? No worry, I don't want you to terror my home. My mom would kill me. Just at the corner, please."

"Fine, until your neighbourhood. I just don't want to hear a police report about a missing person case."

"Deal, officer." I saluted him. Okay that was foolish. He couldn't see me.

I told Mr. Scott the directions until we reached my area of expertise. I held open the door and walked out whilst my other hand was holding onto my clutch and heels.

"Thank you, dear Mr. Scott. Also thanks, you handsome piece of unicorn shit." I giggled and shutted the door hard before I sprinted off. I hope he got awaken, but until then, adios, ladies and gents.