Just A Little Bit ✔️

20. Riley

Riley Jameson, In Real Life

Holly is a model, and probably regarded as one of the most beautiful women in the whole industry. I love her to death, which is why it tears me apart to see her so broken inside. She's hiding behind these massive sunglasses when she walks into the restaurant, and when she pushes them to the top of her head, I can see days old makeup and tears in her eyes.

I take her into a hug as soon as I can, resting my chin on top of her head. "Take a deep breath, Holly. Deep breath."

She nods, clutching the back of my leather jacket in tight fists.

"Where's your head at right now?"

"Somewhere bad," she confesses. "I forgot how it feels to have the world come crashing down around me, but now I'm here. My heart hurts. My chest aches. I haven't talked to Steph in days. God, she must hate me."

I pull back, framing her face. "Look at me— Stephie isn't mad at you. She adores you. She misses you, actually."

"It took me ages to figure out that I even like girls. I've barely accepted myself, and now the world is crucifying me all over social media," Holly whispered, her voice low to keep her from falling apart.

"I'm so sorry." It's all I can say.

"Don't be. Let's just get some drinks. I need a drink."

I buy the best bottle of red wine the restaurant has. Holly loves wine, and she needs a tall glass right about now. She takes a slow sip, closing her eyes with the first drink.

"Thanks, Riley. I needed this."

"It's no problem," I say. "I'm just surprised I had a moment. The tour keeps me busy, and so a moment like this is rare."

"You should be resting," she reminds me, as if I didn't already know that.

"I always have time for a friend," I counter. "How'd your shoot with Vogue go? I know you were there last week."

"It was fine. Fine enough. It's always intimidating being in their studio. Especially when the clothes come off. I did a partially nude shoot, which is always so weird. I feel like every inch of me is wrong and flawed when I have to stand in front of their cameras."

Her cheeks flush, pinkening around the edges of those sharp contours in her face. She sighs.

"I can personally attest that you're perfect. I'm sure Stephie would agree."

She laughs. "Stephie is always hyping me up. There's no one quite like her."

As soon as Holly says her name, everything changes. Her eyes light up, recognizing that special effect her girlfriend has on her. Trying to mask those emotions won't work. They have a connection no one could replicate if they tried.

"You love her, don't you?" I ask.

"Yeah," Holly says. "I do. I haven't found the right way to say it, and it's so complicated now. I can't imagine throwing the words out there with this timing. It's not the best idea."

"I'm sure she'd love to hear from you. Period. It doesn't matter that it's out of the blue. Stephie needs to know you care, and the longer you hold onto the feelings without confessing them, the worst it'll be later. It eats you up. If you love someone, tell them. It's that simple."

I can't help but think of Kinley. Catching feelings was never a part of the plan, but I knew from the moment I saw her she would be a challenge. She makes me feel everything at a hundred, amped up to the max. She's made me angry, and she's made me happy. She's technicolor, and I'm watching her in awe like the best show of my life.

"Kinley's a lucky girl," Holly muses, polishing off her glass of wine.

"I think I lucked out. She's too good for me."

"Does she know you're here right now?"

I hesitate, chewing on my lip.

"Riley," Holly chastises me. "What the hell, man? What are you thinking?"

"I didn't want her to worry, or feel jealous. I don't know... I guess I'm just trying to spare her feelings," I say, realizing how stupid it sounds now that the words are out instead of confined to my head.

"You're a fucking idiot, you know that? When you said keep it on the down low, I assumed Kinley was included in the secret hiding."

I shrug my shoulders. "I guess I'm worried I'll make her jealous. I don't want her to get the wrong idea."

"At some point, I'll smack you upside the head," Holly remarks. "But first, another glass of wine."

With each glass, Holly eases up. She's still distraught as hell, but it fades with time. The beauty of alcohol is it takes away some of the pain. Stress melts away, and your insides grow warm and fuzzy, like life can't touch you so long as you keep drinking.

I know I'm an addict, so I probably shouldn't be describing this in a positive light. Rehab taught me that drinking never solved my problems, and neither did drugs, but sometimes I succumbed to the urge. I mean, it's easy when you're constantly surrounded by temptation.

We stayed until closing time, at which point, I grabbed the check and paid for our meals. Both of us were a bit drunk, so we took cabs to our hotel rooms, and ended the evening on a high note.

I don't expect Kinley to be waiting up, but she's there, perched on the bed. She grins at me when I walk in, wearing nothing but lacy panties and my t-shirt. She's so beautiful without even trying.

"How'd it go?" she asks softly.

I kiss her slowly, teasing her with my tongue before pulling away. "It was fine. Listen, I lied to you, and I wanna fess up to it."

She frowns. "Oh."

"I went to dinner with Holly. Nothing happened. It was completely platonic, but I didn't want to scare you."

"You could have said something. I wouldn't have cared."

"I know. I'm sorry, love. I truly am."

She sighs, pressing a kiss to my neck. "Tell me the truth next time. Please."

"I will," I promise her. "Believe me, what we have is something I never want to ruin."

She takes my hand, pulling me down on top of her. I slide my hands up under her t-shirt tracing her warm skin and hips. She's so perfect, and she's going to drive me crazy if she keeps this up.

As my fingertips wander, she takes a sharp breath. "I'm still mad, but I won't hold it against you."

"Let me make it up to you," I murmur.

Her pupils go wide with excitement.

"You promised me dessert," I continue.

She shivers at my touch, surrendering herself to me. Her pulse is racing, and her face twists in the most beautiful way. She's always so responsive, unable to hide anything she wants from me. I love it. I love her.

Finally, I lower my head, settle between her thighs, and I make it up to her. Twice.