Storybook | random stories written

Voices

Do you know the feeling of being alone? Not just spending a day without your family or friends. Like a real lonely day where you just stare at the ceiling waiting for anything to happen but nothing does. So did he stare at the white ceiling, waiting for his friends to look for him, but they never did. Or at least that is what he remembers from all the time spending in this pretty empty room. Just a white bed with a white, stiril and lightly blood stained blanket folded on it, standing in the bottom left corner of the room. A desk on the other side of the room with a small chair that was attached to the ground so there was no chance that you could hurt anybody or yourself with it. The last thing was an old looking cabinet that probably many used before him. At least it looked really used since you can tell that even the doors were starting to fall off if you opened the cabinet too quickly. Even the windows were made of bulletproof glass and bars kept you from getting out in any sort of way.

So long story short, this place did not just suck for him or anybody before him, it was literally the hell on earth since you could not get out or somehow escape from this place without your doctors permission because you are mentally instable. And he wanted to go. But at the same time he knew that he could not because he already did enough bad stuff that he got told. You might think that all of this was because of bad friends and now he would sit in a jail, waiting for the day to be released into the freedom again, even though you are still not free out there. But if you think it is this, it is not.

All of this happened because of the voices in his own head who told him the most horrible stuff you can only imagine. And he was in a way more worse place than just a jail, it was the Asylum near Scranton, PA. Now he was left behind, sitting all alone in this room, missing his friends who he actually was mad about but little did he know they were not even allowed to see him since they declared him as mentally instable and they were afraid he could hurt him or even the people who helped him the most. He could not understand why this world gave him the voices that kept telling him that he was not good enough to be a part of it. So all this sinless hate against the people he loved the most in his life came because of the voices who kept telling him all of this horrible things.

And in the envy of this night he stood there, staring outside the window right into the moons face with all of his smaller company around the nightsky. Knowing well his best friends were somewhere out there living their normal lifes. He felt lost without them. Outside he slowly saw the dark clouds covering the moons cold but friendly face and it looked like it was just about to rain.

After all these years of being alone and being able to reflect the things he has had done in his life he finally understood that if he would really meet someone he loved, missed and hated so much, they would never understand how he really felt like after all this time. He just remembers some moments like laying next to his girl while there was so much beauty when her eyes layed lost in all the city lights, her clear looking skin and the loved touches they shared with each other. Or moments like sitting there with his best friends looking up to the beautiful nightsky just like now, except they were sitting around a campfire with a guitar in his hands while right now, he was just standing in an almost empty unloved room. The romance, lust and happines is dead and he felt empty. Lost in these four walls, seeing the same thing everyday for three years now. It did not end with this. His pain grew more and more every day and every second and he wanted to scream, let it all out but he could not. Because he was trapped inside and the only way out was to end all of this by himself. All he had to do was to find the right thing and the right time so he could be alone, without anybody to judge him for what he did or what he wanted to do or even for his descision.

Because he already descided to do what he planned to and he knew that it probably was not the best thing. But he pretty well knew that it would hurt less because he wanted to keep the beautiful memories with his friends and not new, ugly ones. Even though he would probably get out he knew that it would never be the same again.

So he wanted to end all of this as soon as possible because he was not sure for how long he could handle this pain without driving completly crazy.

All of this was like water in his lungs, while he could not even drown his demons. He knew that he had lost it all and that it would never come back to him and he decided that for the last time, he would bleed himself dry tonight.

With that said he turned around and faced the door, walking slowly towards it to knock and hope that anybody could hear him. And they did. He left his room and smiled at the nurse for the first time in all the time he has been in there because he was happy that soon all of this would be over. So she leaded him to the bathroom, leaving him alone for a while only to come back afterwards to see him collapsed on the ground laying in his own blood with a small released smile on his lips, almost looking like he was happy to be dead and not alive but little did she know he was.

All of the pain and sadness left his body, may not his soul but he was not trapped in these four walls anymore. He was free, without all the things he would have had to do. He was free eternally and he knew that now, nobody, not even his voices, could hurt him ever again.

~~~~~
𝒲ℯ𝓁𝒸ℴ𝓂ℯ 𝓉ℴ 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝒷ℴℴ𝓀!
𝒜𝓈 ℐ 𝒶𝓁𝓇ℯ𝒶𝒹𝓎 𝓈𝒶𝒾𝒹 𝒾𝓃 𝓉𝒽ℯ 𝒷ℴℴ𝓀 𝒹ℯ𝓈𝒸𝓇𝒾𝓅𝓉𝒾ℴ𝓃, 𝓉𝒽𝒾𝓈 𝒾𝓈 ℊℴ𝒾𝓃ℊ 𝓉ℴ 𝒷ℯ 𝒶𝓃 𝓊𝓃𝓇ℯ𝓁𝒶𝓉ℯ𝒹 ℴ𝓃ℯ𝓈𝒽ℴ𝓉 𝒷ℴℴ𝓀 𝓌𝒾𝓉𝒽 𝓇𝒶𝓃𝒹ℴ𝓂 𝓈𝓉ℴ𝓇𝒾ℯ𝓈 𝓉𝒽𝒶𝓉 ℐ'𝓁𝓁 𝓈ℴ𝓂ℯ𝓉𝒾𝓂ℯ𝓈 𝓅𝓊𝒷𝓁𝒾𝓈𝒽 :)
𝒮ℴℴ, 𝒽𝒶𝓋ℯ 𝒻𝓊𝓃 𝒶𝓃𝒹 𝒹ℴ𝓃'𝓉 𝒻ℴ𝓇ℊℯ𝓉 𝓉ℴ ℯ𝓃𝒿ℴ𝓎✨
𝒰𝓇 𝒟ℯ𝒶𝓇𝓁ℯ𝒶~