To All The Girls I Loved Before┇random

𝓒𝓱𝓪𝓹𝓽𝓮𝓻 𝓣𝓱𝓻𝓮𝓮: 𝓘.𝓝

CHAPTER THREE: I.N

𝘍𝘰𝘳 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐 𝘴𝘦𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘵𝘭𝘺 𝘤𝘢𝘳𝘦𝘥, 𝘕𝘢𝘺𝘦𝘰𝘯.
          𝘠𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘱𝘳𝘰𝘣𝘢𝘣𝘭𝘺 𝘯𝘰𝘵 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘧𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘺𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶'𝘳𝘦 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘭𝘢𝘴𝘵. 𝘈𝘴 𝘐 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘴𝘢𝘺, 𝘪𝘮 𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘺 𝘨𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘵𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘵𝘩𝘢𝘵 𝘐'𝘷𝘦 𝘮𝘦𝘵 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘣𝘶𝘵 𝘥𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘸𝘰𝘳𝘳𝘺, 𝘐 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘭𝘭𝘺 𝘥𝘪𝘥𝘯'𝘵 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸 𝘐 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘶𝘴𝘦 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘸𝘰𝘶𝘭𝘥 𝘐? 𝘗𝘦𝘰𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘭𝘸𝘢𝘺𝘴 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘨𝘰, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘐 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘯𝘬 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘵𝘸𝘰 𝘨𝘪𝘳𝘭𝘴 𝘣𝘦𝘧𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘢𝘳𝘦 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘹𝘢𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘰𝘧 𝘮𝘺 𝘳𝘦𝘢𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘴 𝘸𝘩𝘺 𝘪𝘵'𝘴 𝘩𝘢𝘳𝘥 𝘵𝘰 𝘧𝘢𝘭𝘭 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦𝘰𝘯𝘦 𝘢𝘨𝘢𝘪𝘯.

———

Five years have past. Long enough to make a lot of progress yet Momo still stuck with a broken heart.

When Mina died, she didn't eat properly for months and usually skipped her meals. Making her suffering from major depression.

She finished her study but because of that, Momo have no choice but to stop working. Making her stay at home, receiving money from her aunt and take anti depressant pill.

Her life was now like a world who's always filled with grey sky and cold weather. The world for her was too dark, she can't escape the reality as always.

One time she cried all day, feeling guilty for Mina and Sana because she's blaming herself that the two girl left because of her.

She would sometimes try self harm and hurt herself like tried to slice her wrist using blade, one time she tried to drown herself but luckily someone came and stopped her, and that's her new neighbor Im Nayeon.

Im Nayeon, a girl from province. She moved in Seoul because of job and luckily she met Momo, there was a time that she visited Momo with food because she's new there yet she received a rejection and so she left the food in front of Momo's dorm and left, she didn't even regret giving food to Momo knowing that the girl wont eat it.

Momo's world turned upside down because of Nayeon, when Nayeon wasn't still there she have a quiet day as usual but then she moved, she hasn't have a day when Nayeon annoyed her or visited her.

But thanks to that, Nayeon saved someone.

Apparently after Momo got revived, she mentally breakdown in front of Nayeon, she blurted all— telling all her problems and conditions making Nayeon sad but then it'll not work out if she just listened so she hugged and comfort the latter and since the incident happened, Nayeon decided to move in Momo's dorm so that she could take care of her everyday.

Luckily, Momo didn't mind having Nayeon at the same dorm at all.

Another two years have past and the things are still the same yet they mostly spend their time together on Christmas, New Year, outside or inside the dorm. Mostly, Nayeon is the one why Momo is busy because of things like going outside, taking care of Nayeon's dog, go in a beach together and so on.

Right now, Momo was looking thru a window beside her bed and slowly taking her pill as she observe outside, maybe two years have past but her depression is not yet over, she's still having a battle with it yet thanks for Nayeon, somehow she got a little comfortable lately.

She look at her wrist seeing a lot of scars that she have done before when she tried self harm, she deeply sighed and look at the window again while drinking coffee.

Suddenly, a knock was heard outside her room.

“Come in.” Momo said in a low tone and the door opened and it was Nayeon who's bringing a lot of stuff.

“Jagi-yah~ im sorry im late, it's really traffic outside. By the way, do you want to go somewhere with me?” Nayeon said and Momo nodded without hesitation. Don't get them wrong but Nayeon always used the j word to Momo because she's hoping she'll feel being loved.

“Alrighty then, let me get my things and get ready. Don't sulk okay? I love youuuu!” Nayeon shows some aegyo, hoping that Momo will laugh or smile and with that, Momo smiled bitterly, remembering Mina saying that in the letter.

———

“Where are we going?” Momo said while Nayeon holds her hand tightly with gloves because of cold weather, it's second week of December.

“We're here.” Nayeon stopped walking and looked on her right side.

As Momo looked at Nayeon's direction they both saw Namsan Tower, where Nayeon brought Momo here for their first time having a friendly time together.

“Do you want to take me there?” Momo said but Nayeon shakes her head.

“No, I want you to take me there, please?” Nayeon shows some aegyo again but Momo doesn't even care about it so she just holds Nayeon's hand and brought her up there.

It was late at night but the two of them enjoys the scenery together, even if the weather is cold. They sometimes look at the city and fireworks but sometimes, Nayeon steal glances at Momo who's busy watching.

——

They are walking by Hangang Bridge while Nayeon is eating teokbokki, they stopped right in the middle while another fireworks came, they both just watch it silently but enjoying the view.

Momo then noticed Nayeon who's freezing cold so she gave her scarf and a warm hug just to make the girl feel warmth and also making Nayeon blush.

“By the way, what about these things?” Momo asks because she noticed Nayeon's bagpack and a stroller who's kinda big enough to fit a person.

Nayeon then deeply sighed and hugs Momo tightly with her head resting on her shoulder, not planning to let her go. Suddenly, Momo felt something wet on her shoulder where there's Nayeon's face, realizing that Nayeon is crying.

“Moguri I– Momo.” Nayeon cutted Moguri because she knows that using that name will make Momo hurt because Sana and Mina are the ones who's using it.

“Hey, what's wrong?” Momo asked plainly and pulls away from her but still holding her hand.

“Im sorry.”

“Sorry? For what?” Nayeon just sobbed and closed her eyes.

“Im going to leave soon, I don't know when will I come back again.” Momo smiles bitterly and caress Nayeon's face.

“You're crying because you're leaving? Don't be like th–”

“But how about you? I don't want to leave you. I don't want to be like the–” Nayeon paused because she's filtering words that Momo might get hurt.

“I don't want to leave you like others.” She whisper but surely Momo hears that, she then continues to cry again.

“Don't worry, I'll be fine okay? Im getting used to it tho— you know like people will leave me soon. I don't want you to feel guilty but im just saying the truth.” And with that, Nayeon cries harder that makes Momo's heart ache and so she just hug and comfort Nayeon until she's not crying anymore.

After that Momo calls for a taxi and helps Nayeon with her big bags. Nayeon just looked at Momo with her swollen eyes.

After Momo help her with her bags she is just waiting for Nayeon to go inside but instead Nayeon just hugged her tightly and whisper saying saranghae.

Nayeon then goes inside the car and closed the door and as soon as the taxi left, Momo's eyes follows the taxi making sure that Nayeon is alright until it can't be seen anymore.

Momo then smiles bitterly and a one tiny drop of her tear falls down.

“𝙉𝙖𝙙𝙤 𝙨𝙖𝙧𝙖𝙣𝙜𝙝𝙖𝙚.”

And Momo left, going home alone in the dark, again. Remembering the old times.