Acceptance

   Ryan opened his eyes slowly. The blinding white lights of the room made him aware that he was in a hospital. He felt numb and his throat was as dry as a sandpaper.
"oh thank God,  Ryan. You are awake "
The older man turned his head to the tall blonde man who just rushed to his side. He squinted, trying to make form of his face.
"Quinn?",  his voice was dry and husky from lack of use.
The man in question poured water from a large jar into a tall glass.
" can you sit up? ", Quinn asked worriedly,  his eyes roaming the length of the older man and checking to see if there was any signs of discomfort.
Ryan nodded and tried to raise his body. Quinn helped him bring his action to success. Then,  he brought the water to his lips,  making the older man swallow a mouthful.
He placed the glass back gently on the bedside table and sat down at the edge of the bed.
"What happened? ". Ryan asked,  his voice barely audible and rough.
Quinn's jaw thightened. "you were shot. But you are okay now".
Ryan held his gaze, taking in his appearance. Quinn looked like Shit. There was more than a day stubble on his face. His blue eyes looked tired,  his golden strands were disheveled and his shirt was rumpled.
"How long has it been? ".
"Three days. You scared the shit out of me,  Ryan". Quinn felt tears stinging his eyes. He chuckled dryly. "I didn't know what I'd do if I lose you ".
Ryan swallowed a hard spittle.
"Are you feeling any pain?.  Should I call the nurse? ".
"no,  Quinn. I feel numb so I guess I'm okay".
Quinn nodded and stood up.
"where are you going? ", Ryan panicked.
"Hey,  it's okay. I just want to let the nurse know you are awake", he reassured with a smile. "I'm not going anywhere".
Ryan nodded.
Quinn observed him for a moment. "can I kiss you on the forehead?".
Ryan nodded with a faint smile.
Quinn leaned in,  pushed some strands aside and kissed him softly on his forehead. Impulsively,  Ryan closed his eyes.
Quinn pulled away with an awkward smile. " I should go call that nurse"
The older man watched him leave with a content smile on his face. Any other thought was pushed back to the back of his mind.

************************************ 
    Two knocks sounded on the door soon followed with a creak as it was slowly opened.
Quinn popped his head out to see if Ryan was asleep but the bed was made.  He heard the sound of the shower stopping. Then,  he stepped in and closed the door.
Just then,  Ryan appeared with a towel    wrapped around his waist,  revealing his lean body and the bandage on the left side of his stomach.
"just wanted to let you know dinner is ready", Quinn explained.
Ryan nodded. "I'll be out in a jiffy".
The younger man nodded and turned to leave but on a second thought he stopped.
"Ryan "?
"yeah?,  he gave him a curious expression,  a T-shirt in hand.
"About everything,  I'm sorry. "
"There is nothing to be sorry for,  Quinn. It's not your fault my dad shot me and it's definitely not your fault he is in jail. He brought it on himself,  couldn't accept who his son is. Sooner or later,  I will have to accept who i am".
" yeah,  you are right".
" you just shove me in the right direction and for that I'm grateful"
Quinn smiled. "I should leave you to dress up before Tilda comes up with a different idea".
" wait", Ryan said and walked towards him.
Quinn tried to ignore the intense pulse of his heart.
Their gaze was intent on each other's faces.
Ryan leaned in and kissed him on the lips. That moment,  Quinn could hear the rush of his blood through his veins. His heart beat literally seized. He didn't move. He left his head extended there waiting for the older man to pull back.
He felt Ryan pushed his tongue into his mouth and an involuntary groan escaped him. Not being able to restrict himself any longer,  he took control of the kiss. Stretching his arms, he brought him closer to his body.
His right hand layed lazily on the dark haired man's waist before venturing to his backside and squeezing the firm lobes of flesh. An erotic moan sounded from the older man and he deepened the kiss. Damn,  he missed this. He missed Ryan being vulnerable in his arms. In the outside world,  he acted tough, reserved and independent. But here in the secret, in his arms, he was a totally different person.
  Ryan gently pulled away and rested his head on the crook of Quinn's shoulders. He was breathing heavily and he could feel the younger man's erection against his left thigh.
" Fuck,  Quinn chuckled. " I probably need to take care of this before I go back".
Ryan laughed and pulled away to stare at him. " I could help you".
Quinn pinched his cheek " we both know how that would turn out"
Ryan shook his head in amusement and walked back to the closet to dressed himself.
"how are you not affected by that kiss? "he looked baffled.
" Ryan shrugged. "It's probably because I'm older than you".
" That doesn't make any sense". See you at the table",  Quinn gave up.
"Aren't you taking care of that? "
Quinn shrugged. "it's not as satisfying as being buried deep in you", he winked.
Ryan's eyes dilated, his cheeks a deep red. "Get out", he said, trying to sound serious.
Quinn laughed and turned to leave.