Wrong Game

Chaper 32

K-Ross (the morning before he went to trinity)

The night was rough as my agitated mind was battling as to what had happened some hours back in the previous day I questioned my self what if Kim was aware of me being here I wasn't ready to face her for two reason one I wasn't over the fact that she left me there I know it's weird for a black man to feel this kind of weak emotions but that was me and still is me and I can't change that cause it's part of who I am and yes it hurt me bitterly. And secondly I wasn't sure of how she will take the fact that I lied about being broke or I pretended to be someone I wasn't really but really did I really lie? I just didn't want anything to do with my genitor he was mean to me and I had bad memories I didn't want to have on me all my life because I took from him.
But I learned from my moments of being away from him that he wasn't the only one like that even people who were average or barely had a thing to really show off for had the tendency of belittling others when they didn't have or made mistakes it was a sick world in need of redemption cause most people were just losing it not thinking just doing whatever without caring.
I wasn't an exception to the rule I had my flaws too I remember my past and it kinda hurts me that I did all these things to all these women or girls if I may say so all these girls I slept with without loving them lying to them and all these things I did for my selfish sexual satisfactions.
I realized I couldn't fix the world but I could try to fix me and do we with apologizing to these women I had hurt before now I didn't even remember some but the numbers were alarming I even hated to admit it to my self
"I'm a hoe🤷🏽‍♂️🤦🏽‍♂️" I thought loudly...
then I remembered the advice and all the messages my mother used to send me about being a better person and that the only way I could do that will be through God. Yeah mum was highly spiritual she gets up every night to pray I wonder how she does it but she does and till date she does.
My reached out for my phone and went through our chats and there I found out that even what I was doing right now was wrong but I couldn't stop it I had to finish what I started but I needed to clear my conscience.
I hit in my mother's number and aimed for a call it was 5:30 am usually she will be sleeping but I needed her words to ease my conscience.
It rang about three times before I heard her soft voice through the phone.
"Hey son are you okay?"
"Uhumm yeah mom uhh I'm good"
"K.R?"
"Yes mum"
"You do know put on your first diapers yes? And that I knew your single caprices even when you didn't have teeth? And that I know when you need my attention? So now tell me what's wrong talk to me" damn mothers knew a whole lot about about their children.
"Haha you do know me well"
"I carried you and you popped on me many times so yes I do know my only Son"
"I'm not okay mother"
"I know I can tell from your voice and I also know you won't tell me fully what's going on"
"Yeah"
"Like your father so like him introverts when it came to opening up"
"I'm nothing like him mum"
"Lie your self but that isn't the matter you feel lonely don't you?"
"I..I don't kn.."
"I know you do and even me can't fill that emptiness in you I can only temporally I love you but not as much as the person who can put you back in full love and not feel lonely" I already knew who she was talking about we were going to have a long bible talk now i shouldn't have called maybe.
"Mum.."
"Just listen when you left I had to deal with your father alone nobody to help me I wasn't talking to you and worst to him if I ever felt more alone was then... then I remembered I wasn't alone and that God was there with me you know what I did? I trusted him I started back with him from scratch I let him fill me up again make me whole. And guess what happened he didn't just make me love my self again but he made feel loved therefore no more loneliness and above all he answered my one wish as I always begged him"
"What was that?"
"To bring you back safe and change you i am sure right now you are experiencing those chances you feel guilt for every single lie or mistake you did that you could have avoided but I tell you this is the first step to be with him again"
"How do you know this mum?"
"Because I know him and I know you too and I know he will answer my wish with you"
"I don't know mother everything feels wrong to me lately I don't know what to do"
"You know what to do"
"Mum"
"Pray go down on your knees and pray this isn't for anybody you don't need money you were given it already you just need your heart to be back again"
" I don't know how to do that anymore these past years changed me mother it did"
"It changed you for what is coming next in line for you do what is right to do"
"Thank you mum"
"I know you just want to run this call but remember this God loves you and you need him just like he needs you but for now do the right things first. Pray son I'll drop now I need to get ready for a charity event this morning so you take care and I love you"
"I love you too mother"

She dropped the call and I was there on my bed puzzled after all she said was it really God that I needed? It was hard to understand I wish I understood him.
"What do you want from me?" I closed my eyes as I whispered those words and the strangest thing happened you won't believe it. In that silent room where I was alone a voice rang in my head and I could swear I heard out loud it only said.
"I want you"
I jumped off the bed wondering what this was... and before I could clearly sit up and think my phone rang this time from was a text from Mike
"It's time you need to get ready for her room"
It was 8am already and I needed to execute the plan so I got dressed and headed straight for room today was going to be an interesting one.

*hey guys sorry I took some days to do this one it mattered to me to pinpoint how amazing mothers were and I had to make it in this one. I hope you enjoyed this the next chapter is going to be 🔥🔥🔥 😼😼😼 watch out...

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