Kape, dre? +tagalog

What am I doing w/ my life?

As blunt as I could be, Hindi ko na alam ang ginagawa ko sa buhay ko. Believe me when I say I'm really happy for those people who's got their head around sa bagay na gusto nilang gawin but at the same time can you share us your secrets? 

Paano ko nga ba malalaman na kung ano man ang ginagawa ko ngayon is my purpose in life, ano nga ba dapat kong ginagawa?

What do I enjoy? What am I good at? Where do I excel on?

Ang daming tanong, walang makasagot.

I'm aware that nothing big comes easy so I really have to work hard for it but where do I start?

Writer. Blogger. Business owner. Model. Artista. Lawyer. Politician. Speaker. Psychologist

I'm stuck in between the idea of doing what I want and what I have to do.

Ako lang ba ang nawawala? Ako lang ba ang nag-iisa?

My parents have always been supportive they always say "Do whatever makes you happy" paano kung ang whatever makes me happy ay hindi good enough? Why do I even worry whether it's good enough or not? Why can't I just be satisfied of just doing it; but it's not that easy. 

Maybe that's life. There should always be a balance to everything; to reach an equilibrium.

But how do I find that? How would I know if I'm there... How would I know if this is it... How...

Little birdies told me to always try something different, get the feel of each types of things so you'd figure out which one will stand out

Ang dami ko ng naumpisahan na hinantungan ay kawalan. Nakakapagod na din umasa but there's always a little voice inside my head that tells me to keep trying, this is just the start.

Maybe that's why I can't succeed on something. Because instead of facing an obstacle I run away, I try to find an easier way out, an escape route and the cycle begins again. I try something new I get scared and I watch it begin again.

It's like watching you lose who you are without even knowing who you are yourself.

I work hard. I study hard but I can feel myself refusing everything, rejecting the information, it's like  trying to open a door with the wrong key. Basically doing the wrong thing for your given purpose. But how am I supposed to know what door to open? Is there an instruction manual about life that I wasn't able to get?

I feel so lost and I don't know what to do, why does life have to be so constricted? affiliated? confusing? HARD. Why does it have to be hard. For someone who has only a lifetime to spend is this the price to pay?