Can We?

20...Disorder

1 Hour.

Only 1 hour left.

In the next hour she was going to step onto that stage and showcase to the world she had done it...Finally.

Graduation was something nearly everyone looked forward too, even more so now in college where they were once pubescent teens, entering the expansive campus with expectations and deliberations. And now, leaving such stereotype and becoming men and women who have been crafted into ideal individuals to make a mark in society and in their life. To create a name for themselves, catapult themselves into the limelight of their careers and thrive in creating an ideal future for themselves and everyone else.

They were also there to make everyone around them proud, announcing the success they have achieved and how this milestone has been overcome, and celebrating an eventful day with the people who mean the most to you.

Seulgi was happy.

Well...somewhat.

Actually, she was less than happy.

Distraught more like it and confused and even angry.

It was only a month ago Joohyun broke off their relationship. Saying she no longer loved her, needed her or wanted her. She said she outgrew them both, got tired and no longer needed what they had and those words is what made Seulgi's heart break, hearing it crack inside of her in a million jagged pieces, feeling the piercing edges cut through. The first few days, she cried herself to sleep. While at home, her parent's noticed the solemness across her face but they didn't need to ask what or why she was like that, it's as if they knew already and they only uttered the words "Honey, did you need anything?" or they pulled her into hug.

She didn't understand how and she didn't understand why.

It was a simple "I don't love you anymore."

To Seulgi, she didn't understand how Joohyun had made up her mind like that and just decided to pull the plug. But at the back of her mind, she had an inkling she was hiding something which even confused her more.

She initially felt denial, unable to fathom how the one person she loved had just disappeared just like that. No more hangouts, no more regular calls, no more regular texts and there was no one for her to visit in that office.

She tried amending what they had, where they had their last phone call just last week. She could hear Joohyun, hold her breath then saying it's probably best they go their seperate ways and apologise for the abruptness of it all. There was tremble, a hitch in the tone of her voice and Seulgi couldn't help but wonder if this is really what Joohyun wanted, if she had made this decision against her will or simply, she was just so sorry for no longer feeling the same way she felt. It was hard pill to swallow and people weren't lying when they said "the truth hurts."

Now, she was probably angry.

She didn't want to be angry, especially on this special day where all her hard work had paid off and she was going to embark on life after college. But there was no denying the fact that Joohyun helped her get to the finish line, but also the false promise of her being there.

She clenches her jaw, tapping her heels against the cold granite floor as it echoes while she sits on a pew, one of the wooden benches that were outlaid on the sides of the foyer of the science building. With her black graduation gown beside her neatly folded and the royal blue silk sash that was adorn with bordering gold trims, Seulgi was concerned she may start crying again and that the makeup that Joy and Yeri had worked hard on putting on her face may fade. She waited for the two of them while they were sorting out the mortarboards for the three of them, since the ones they intially received were eiether too small or too large for their heads. Eventually, the two of them emerge bickering as they approach her, causing her to slightly smile at their remergence.