Lovestruck -(Wes x reader)- book two

Baby, I'm struggling

Trigger warning: Brief mentions/ hints at talking about self harm / suicide

This chapter is so short I'm sorry I'm legit just trying to finish this book that I'm Not even sure i should have made🙈 book one is a million times better and I'm so Sorry about that

Also have a Steve Harrington x reader oneshot in the works But i don't know if Will finish it🤷🏻‍♀️

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Pretending that everything is normal when everything feels broken is hard.

Every single day was a struggle. Everything was hard.

Emily felt off. She had been feeling off for Ages now.

She wanted to cry or scream or do anything if it would make her feel better.

She knew she had to let Wes know. He deserved to know. She wanted to be honest with Him but she needed to Word it right as she didn't want to hurt Him or Lie to Him.

She wanted to ask for help for how to Word it so she had met with Shayne at a cafe.

They were awkwardly sitting across from each other. Shayne was waiting for her to speak and Emily was trying to gather up the courage to tell Shayne how she was feeling.

But it was all a lot and a lot to say to him and she didn't want to hurt him.

'Shayne I I -' Emily started to say but paused

Telling Shayne how her world was falling apart was like ripping off a bandaid. Difficult. How would she ever going to tell Wes without crumbling

Shayne could sense his one of his best friends were struggling so he put his hand on top of hers.

' you know you can tell me anything right?' Shayne questioned

' yeah I know but what I want no what I need to say is very hard'

'That's okay Em'

'Really?' Emily asked

'Yes'

Emily took a deep breath

' I'm really mentally unwell I'm struggling a lot at the moment' Emily confessed

Shayne stayed silent but gave her a reassuring smile as if to say that everything was okay

She continued

' I can't sleep properly, I'm always tired and I can't stop thinking about everything and I feel like I'm drowning like I can't breathe'

'It will be okay Em'

'And I've considered hurting myself recently and if people are better without me in their lives'

'They wouldn't be Em. We all love you'

' I know but I'm always so depressed and my mind gets to me and all the thoughts never go and'

' have you told Wes how you feel?'

'No' Emily admitted

'Em he needs to know'

'Trust me I know. I just don't want to hurt him. If I tell him he will be worried about me or upset that he can't do anything and I don't want him to feel like it's on him to fix me or for him to feel like he isn't enough for me'

' I know em but he will be more upset by you holding stuff back than you being honest'

'I just don't know how to tell him without him getting hurt'

' is that why you wanted to meet me?' Shayne asked

'Yes I need my besties advice for this'

Shayne smiled at that before giving her a serious expression

' I think all you can do is be honest and tell him how you feel. He adores you Em. He will understand'

'Yeah I hope so' Emily sighed as she looked out through the window

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The next day Emily has invited Wes over and things had been a little tense between them but they had had Chinese and they had just finished watching dead pool 2.

They had been cuddling together on the couch Emily took a deep breath and asked in a serious tone of voice

' Wes?'

Wes tensed

Emily started to get anxious so she sat up and looked at him. She was scared.

' I've been struggling lately. Everything has felt really heavy like I was holding a vase overflowing with water and I was getting worried that I would drop and break it. What I'm trying to say is that I've been struggling not to harm myself and-

In the middle of her speech Wes was  silent. He untangled himself from Emily, he didn't say anything as he Got up but stopped for a brief second as if to catch his breath But he had his back turned and  he mumbled 'i can't ' and he shook his head as he rushed out of the room and out of her appartment

She stared after him in shock.

Fuck.