Siren's Mark

Chapter 42

A/N: This chapter contains discussion of violence and some graphic imagery.

𝔸𝕧𝕒

When Jen suggested a night of 'drinking and stranger-boning' to help me get over my ex, ending up in the back of a private car with the aforementioned ex was pretty much the last possible result I had in mind.

But here I am. Sitting in the back of a black SUV in awkward silence.

Someone kill me.

"So where's the Challenger?" I ask, if only to interrupt the uncomfortable moment.

"At my place," he said. "I got a ride here."

"You left your car at home?"

"Yeah, I was drunk."

That's odd. Zane's not much of a heavy drinker; I've only seen him drunk a handful of times.

"You were drunk and you got a ride to a bar?" I ask. "Doesn't that seem a little redundant?"

"Yeah well I've been drunk a lot lately," he says. "Kind of comes with the whole fuck up territory."

He leans on the window and his breath clouds the glass. Even with the sadness behind his eyes, he's still incredibly beautiful.

Shut up, brain.

"So earlier, why did you say you thought I was in danger from you?" I ask, mostly in an attempt to distract myself.

"I uh," he pauses and his eyes fall to his lap. "There's this old wive's tale of sorts in the Immortal community, that long-term exposure to Siren venom can drive humans insane. That eventually, they either lose their minds or die."

"Oh."

It's never good to have an ex tell you they thought you were literally going insane.

"I didn't know," he says. "About your medication side effects. I thought... I thought I was killing you. I thought I had to..."

"Had to break up with me over the phone?"

I try to sound playful and not bitter but my tone definitely gives me away.

"Fuck," he says dropping his head into his hand. "I'm so sorry about that, Ava. I couldn't risk seeing you... I knew if I could see your face, touch you, I'd never be able to do it. I was sobbing, I could barely hold it together. But I wanted you to be able to move on and just think I was a tosser and go have the kind of life you deserve."

Bullshit.

"Bullshit," I say. "If you were so broken up about me, then why were you laughing at the bar with Kieran and some girl the next day? You didn't look real devastated to me."

"Kieran didn't tell you?" he asks.

"Tell me what?" I ask.

"I er," he sighs and looks out the window again. "I took something. It's called lethe. It's kind of a magical drug of sorts. It makes you forget."

"Forget what?"

"It depends how much you take. For mortals how much you drink determines how much you forget, and the effect is permanent."

"As in, you never get those memories back?"

"Yeah..." he says with a sigh. "But for Immortals, drinking more can make you forget more or it can make the effects last longer before they wear off."

"So you took this stuff to forget me?" I ask.

"I..." he says, then pauses a moment. "Fuck, I don't even know. I took it because I was in pain. I couldn't bear the thought of having hurt you like that, it was miserable. I just kept hearing your voice, seeing your face. I just kept picturing a future without you and it seemed unbearable. It felt like a snake eating a hole in my chest. I just couldn't handle it. I was desperate."