Jannat

Unknown number

I am beat too much excitement for one day, beating  a guy to committing to a guy. MJ really out did herself with this years present. I admit the guy is hot and as much as I heard from MJ in the past he is a really good son and a person.And he has a man bun and that beard he looks so macho I can't hide my excitement. But everything fades. Who will want me as a wife, I can't be his wife. Nobody will want to be with me when they know my past. MJ knows but not everything. The secrets she know is big but it just the peak of the iceberg ,there is more to the story. I have been fighting with myself for so long  the only refuge for me is Allah. The thoughts are so negative and painful before It could consume me I rushed into the bathroom to take a shower and pray. Praying always helped after praying my mind seems to be at peace and thank allah and make dua, "Ya Allah please save me from myself and give me strength to fight and live peacefully under your wings till the day I die".

After finishing my prayers I walk up to Mannat's room it's already nine and she is sleeping in the bed with a story book in her hand. She looks so peaceful in her sleep . I take the story book and keep it on the side table near the bed and take the blanket and cover her before giving her a kiss on the forehead " Sleep little one I will protect you from the world". I go back to the room and opening my hand wide I fall on the bed. I remember the day bought this house a month after MJ had found us. We had stayed at her house for so long I did not feel like I could live with her anymore and take advantage of her generosity . She's breathing fire after days of continuous begging and  finally let us leave separately here. First she was not happy with the place I had chose so she found out this house which she says is a safe neighbourhood it was expensive and she had bought the house. I insisted that I will pay her back going into another argument finally she gave up so now she is our landlord . This place is not so big , it has two full size rooms with attached bathrooms and a living room with an open kitchen. First few weeks she continuously came to our place then when she was sure we were more than able to take care of ourselves she minimize her visits , that did not stop her from calling every single day. I was lost in the memories when my phone buzzed. It was from a private number
Private: hey wanna meet up for breakfast tomorrow ... say eight morning ... I'll pick you up , mom wants us to drop Mannat at her office to have breakfast with her...
Me: !!!! Omar ????
Private: Hehe XD ... Oops sorry forgot to mention .... Yea it's Omar
Me: Sure
Omar: So it's a date ☺
Me:  No ... its just breakfast
Omar : Ok a breakfast date ... cool see you then .... Good night
Me: Goodnight
I blush looking back at our conversation so it's a date. My very first date with a guy .. overly handsome guy. I was grinning foolishly but as fast as it came it was gone. Ahhhh .. depressingly I try to sleep .. I need to tell them. I can't destroy someone's life. They deserve the truth. After rolling on the bed for quite some time I fallasleep . But the sleep did not last for long as the nightmares begin.
    I look into the mirror. I look like a dead person and walk into Mannat's room and she is ready awake " Maan please get ready , we are leaving at eight , MJ wants to have breakfast with you". She rushes into the bathroom . I walk back to my room and get into the shower , after finishing I put on some makeup and go my closet. I choose plain white t-shirt , white trousers, a colorful floral kimono for layering and nude shawl as I am not feeling like heel so I finish my look with a white sneakers. As I was ready I hear the doorbell ring. I take my nude backpack making sure that I had my wallet and phone I put on a round shape sunglasses and get out of the room by the time Maan had already opened the door for Omar. As I set out I hear a click and a flash. I look up and Omar is holding a camera , he is wearing blue short sleeve shirt with white birds on it ,tucked into a blue trousers and paired with black loafers. He looked hot "Ahm what you doing" , making memories ... here " he hands the camera to Maan and walks near me keeping a hand on my shoulder " Smile" he whispers and Maan takes a photo. He goes to Maan and takes the camera from Maan and checks if its ok and turn to me " Our first date captured for memory" I blush.  How can he be so natural. We lock the door and go for the car. We first drop Maan to the office and then go to a small café near the office.
As reach our table which is situated near the balcony facing the sea. " May I" he ask taking the menu an orders for both of us . He orders a simple breakfast garlic bread , omelette, garden salad , sausages , orange juice and coffee . he looks to me and asked if the order was ok and I give him a smile. " Lets play a game, we both ask each other 20 questions" he asks cutting through the awkward silence " So you mean lets have a normal conversation" I raise a brow to him . He smiles " fair enough".

Omar: Where are you originally from ?
Me: My dad was from turkey and my mother is from Bulgaria . And You?
Omar: I know that you know that but still , mom is from Pakistan and dad Saudi. So what is you favorite colour?
Me: depends on my mood .. Yours?
Omar: Pink , I know it's a feminine colour back at school I really got teased for that but I love the pink hues the skies make during sunrise and sunset. Favorite food ?
Me: Food ☺ I love food .. anything and everything edible ... Yours?
Omar: Will your question always be yours ??? Anyways i am a sweet tooth and I am utterly and deeply in a serious relationship with anything chocolate. What's your favorite destination ?
Me: Venice .. I love the history behind the place and the place is built on freaking water what's not to like it
I was excited and involuntary outburst , sooner I realized making me blush,
Omar:I think it beautiful the way you sparkle when you talk about things you love.
He was not making the situation any easier, I blushed crimson. We had a pleasant conversation by the time we finished our breakfast we had known a few things about each other. It was a beautiful date.

After the date we had back to the office . I worked at MJ's company as a legal advisor and we own RIZA Law firm ., I started to work for MJ at 18. I did my masters still working in the company. I was a Straight A student and was studying in Law school on scholarship when everything went wrong but I wanted a better life for me and my sister so I never stop struggling and when MJ came into the picture she was a strong motivation. After my master I opened RIZA law firm a criminal law firm speacially fighting cases against unlawful conduct against women and MJ didn't want to let me go so she became a partner and I am still the legal advisor for Hijab house .It was a Sunday . But still I had some urgent matters to handle so I get back to work. During our date I had forgotten everything and now it is nagging me like a hammer on my head. I take my phone and send a message to MJ and Omar.

Me: Can we meet for dinner at your place tonight ?
MJ : Sure darling Jaan , see you at seven.
Omar: Cool , let me know when you ready I will pick you up.
After finishing work I decided to walk home it was only few block away I am glad that we leave near work and MJ other otherwise it would be a drag. I don't like to riding for hours to get to home after a hectic day. I walk slowly trying to get my thoughts together I was nervous , scared , vulnerable but they deserve to know. As I get home I take a shower while walking to the closet I send a message to Omar to pick me up at half past six an also message amber to babysit Mannat,she was a 18year cute girl doing internship at hijab house and Mannat's babysitter since 2years .I take of an oversized light blue sweater dress with a white turtleneck , black tights , purple turban  and finishing with a purple turban , multicolour necklace and black heels.

As I walk into the living room the bell rings and open the door for Omar. " Maa sha allah , you look beautiful as always". I give a weak smile and thank him. We ride to Jaan Mansion is silence. MJ was already sitting in the dinner table waiting for us. She looked at me and waves me to the chair to sit , we have dinner in silence. I know she wants to ask why I call for a meeting but I know she wants me to be the one to talk and is giving me the time. I love how she could read me. We move to the living room and sit down facing each other. I could feel the cold sweat escaping done my spine and fingers are shaking I try to gather myself. I hit myself mentaly " It now or never" I mumble to myself.