When Abed reunites with his middle school crush, the rest of the Greendale seven begin to feel as though the entire fabric of their group is at risk of being torn to shreds. The natural order has been toppled and the Trobed bromance is at stake. Wha...
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February 18, 2011: Time to Scheme
"Alright," Shirley began, assertively, "now that we know Pierce isn't really dying and didn't actually leave me a cd of all of my friends talking bad about me behind my back, it's time to get back to what we were doing before this started: scheming."
"Aw, c'mon when you say it like that it makes us seem like we're doing something bad," Annie joked, bouncing happily as she always does. "We're just trying to help a friend."
With her face overcome by realization, Shirley replied, "I guess you're right. I was just using the word Abed did."
Suddenly, Annie froze. Dramatically pointing her finger down the hallway, she shouted, "There she is! Quick, before we lose her!"
The pair hurried down the hall with determination in their eyes, chasing after the short girl with little green pigtails and a Darth Vader backpack(who was, shockingly, pretty fast given how short her legs were).
"Hey! Benny! Wait up!" Annie exclaimed, waving her arms frantically to get the girls attention.
Benny stopped in her tracks and then turned, slowly, coming face to face with two-sevenths of Greendale's greatest study group. Pulling her books tighter in her flannel-clad arms, she glared at the two suspiciously. "Can I help you?"
"Yes, actually. I'm Shirley, and this is Annie. We heard you happen to know our little friend Abed," Shirley began sweetly, "We were wondering if you would be interested in, I don't know, going out with him some time? Say, maybe, this weekend?"
"Ohhh, I get it," Benny replied, small smirk grazing her lips. "You guys want to get us together."
In unison, Annie and Shirley replied, "Yeah."
Sadly, Benny answered, "Well, I'm sorry, I can't help you guys."
Shirley and Annie looked at her helplessly, defeated and confused beyond measure. "What do you mean? Why not?" Annie questioned, starting to get visibly frustrated.
"Abed and I made an agreement that, if we were to meet up again sometime in the future, we wouldn't reunite unless it would fit into our storyline right. When it does, Abed will tell me the secret code word. Until then, we have to live our lives separately."
"Well, that's unfair," Annie argued. "Why can't you tell him the code word?"
"He always has room in my storyline, and he knows that," Benny explained in a sort of bittersweet tone. "And I also sort of forgot the code word. I didn't think I would ever be back here again. But my dad has cancer, so I'm staying here to take care of him and taking classes to fulfill his dreams of me furthering my education."
"Oh, sweetie, that's so sad," Shirley cooed. "I'm here whenever you need me. I'll pray for you."
"Save your prayers, my father's a bastard," Benny chuckled, much to Shirley's shock. "And don't go scheming any further. Abed will come to me when he's ready. You guys are kind of bad friends for trying to force him into something."
Benny turned and walked away, leaving Annie and Shirley standing in shocked silence.
"Oh dear, she is just as strange as Abed."
"Yeah, maybe Abed was right. Maybe this was a bad idea," Annie agreed.
"I'm telling you, I knew it when Troy said she had green hair. She's no good."
......... later that day ..........
"Abed, can we talk to you?" Annie asked, placing her hand gently on his arm as he stood to leave the study room with the rest of the group. He nodded, sitting back down at the table across from Shirley and Annie.
"You got information from Troy and talked to Benny for me, didn't you?"
Looking down with shame, Shirley replied, "Yes, we may have."
"I told you, it's not going to work out."
"We understand that now Abed," Annie explained. "She told us about your agreement and the code word she forgot, and we just wanted to say, we support your decision and we're sorry for meddling in your love life."
"Wait, say that again."
"Annie said we are very sorry for trying to force you into a relationship you're not ready for, isn't that right, Annie?"
"No, back up. The part about the code word."
Confused, Annie responded, "You have a code word you'll say if you'll fit into the storyline?"
"And...?" Abed pressured.
"She said she forgot it, but that you'll always fit into her storyline," Annie snapped, crossing her arms, "I don't see why that matters, Abed, you said you weren't interested."
"I wasn't interested because I thought she wasn't. I'm still really intimidated by her because she used to be taller than me. And she's the only girl I've ever actually loved. I didn't want to scare her off by using the code word first, but I can totally see a storyline with her in it now. You guys were right. I've gotta go make plans for the perfect reunion now. Bye."
Abed rushed out of the study room, determination in his eyes.
"What are we going to do, Annie? That girl is not right for our precious Abed. I should have just set him up with one of the good little Christian girls from my church group."
"Maybe it will work out," Annie said, trying to convince herself just as much as Shirley. "Sure, she's a little weird, but so is Abed, right? Let's just stay positive."
"No, Annie. You and I both know what we need to do now," Shirley replied. "We need to scheme to make sure those two don't get together."
Popping his head in the study room, Troy blurted, "What? I thought we wanted them together?"
"No, Troy," Shirley cautioned, her voice grumbling like an old fortune teller. "This girl is weird, and Abed needs someone normal to keep him in check. I know you don't want someone weird stealing away your boyfriend, do you?"
"No, I guess not."
Patting the table, Shirley bellowed, "Well, then, it's settled. It's time to scheme."
