Selfish

SECOND CHAPTER

"ʏᴏᴜ sᴀʏ... ɪ'ᴍ ᴄʀᴀᴢʏ. 'ᴄᴜᴢ ʏᴏᴜ ᴅᴏɴ'ᴛ ᴛʜɪɴᴋ ɪ ᴋɴᴏᴡ ᴡʜᴀᴛ ʏᴏᴜ'ᴠᴇ ᴅᴏɴᴇ."

The music blasted through my headphones. The plane was about to land and I was still bawling my eyes out from time to time. Thankfully, I booked a much more costly accommodation so no one could notice my dread except for some flight attendants passing by. At first, they offered me some refreshments, but I politely declined. They then decided to leave me alone to my business and tend to the other passengers. I used Timothy's black card he left me whenever he would always go on a business trip.

"I wouldn't want to buy something unnecessary on impulse," He would say. What irony.

Remembering him and what happened earlier emitted a sharp pain in my chest and I had to bite the inside of my cheek to stop myself from sobbing loudly. I press on the volume bar of my phone and push my earbuds further in my ear to drown out the noise of the outside world.

*

I arrive at our house and before I could hop out, I saw Sam was out on the garage playing basketball. He didn't seem to notice the cab until after he shot his score and turned to get the ball.

I then climb out of the taxi and avoid eye contact with my son. I didn't want to look so pitiful and let him see me. I stopped crying 30 minutes ago but I knew my eyes were still red and puffy. I decided to wear some shades I bought at a gift shop in an attempt to hide them. Though, I was aware of how this wouldn't go very well as I planned it would.

I walked up the pathway and up our balcony when I hear Sam jogging towards me.

"I thought you weren't coming home until Wednesday?" He asked.

"Yeah... some things got rearranged with your father and... and I had to go home." It was still Monday. Also, my voice cracked, making Sam narrow his eyes at me. I couldn't control my breathing. It was as if I was finding it hard to breathe at the moment and I had to suck in short, desperate gasps for air.

My son was tall. Taller than his father by about 2 more inches. He was also as built as his father. A trait he was proud of that helped him at sports. Because of that, he was more than tall enough to peek between the sunglasses and catch me.

"Why are you crying?" He asks, his face full of suspicion.

I wave him away, "It's nothing." but he persisted on and moved in front of me.

I frown at him, "Sam."

"You wouldn't be crying over nothing, dad." He points out.

"I-I'm just sad we had to change plans." I attempt to push him aside, but he wouldn't budge.

"Then you'd be pissed. Just tell me, dad." He pushed on. Crossing his arms like he was the one lecturing me.

I do not want to tell him that I just caught his father cheating on me with a woman. A woman! Knowing my son, he would probably do something stupid and cause a fight between him and Tim. The last time that happened was also when he dislocated his shoulder. Timothy and I were arguing and he butted in to yell at Timothy since Tim was starting to make me cry. Not my best moment. It made me helpless and dependent.

"What happened?" He asks.

I don't want to ruin this. He doesn't need to know. He does, but I just can't ruin his life right now. I know what it feels like when you thought you knew your parent and find out they'd been unfaithful to your mother. It makes you look at that person differently from then on and it affects everything you do in your life from school to family values to personal life and even your own love life.