Her Knight - Sansa Stark FanFiction (GirlxGirl)

13

Isabelle's POV

I just laid  there, staring up at the ceiling, I was in both shock and amazement. Did that...Did that actually happen? The things I felt, the way Cersei made me feel. The things she did...With more than her fingers...It...Was..Magical? I had never felt such things before.

However, I did feel bad that I didn't do anything in return, once the most amazing feeling surged through my body, Cersei stopped and now she just sat on the edge of her bed. Deep in thought.

"Am..Am I to do something to you?" I asked, breaking the silence rather awkwardly.

"No, that's quite alright. I...I don't think you're ready."

I furrowed my eyebrows and turned so I was on my side, I propped myself up on my elbow and just stared at her. She turned her head slightly to look at me and then turned back.

"This was a mistake wasn't it?"

"No, no. It's just.."

Cersei didn't know how to finish the sentence and so I took it upon myself to get dressed and leave without saying another word. I was slightly hurt. It was clearly a mistake what she did to me, and she was right. Maybe I wasn't ready to do things to her. Maybe I would never get the chance, maybe I didn't want to.

She was my first time...Well, it was the first time someone had done things like to me. She had seen all of me and she was regretting it and quite frankly, so was I now.

Nothing like this would happen again, not just because she was royalty, but because I didn't want it. I didn't want her. 

It was getting late and so it was the perfect time for me to see Ned, I needed answers and I didn't want anyone to disturb. I waited until the guard moved and I carefully but quickly made me way to the dungeon, praying that I didn't get caught sneaking in to see him.

I held my breath as I walked through the dark, disgusting dungeon, it smelled horrendous, I had never smelt something so vile in my life.

Most of the cells were empty except for a few prisoners who chose to ignore me, but when I reached the end, I jumped slightly as Ned grabbed the bars and said my name.

"What are you doing? You shouldn't be down here."

"Neither should you...Or at least that's what I thought until I saw the letter."

Ned lowered his head and pressed his forehead against the bars of the cell. "Everything in the letter was true. Please, believe me, just...Just think about it. Think. Come on, Isabelle. I know you're smart enough to think about the logic behind it."

"Just admit you don't like Joffrey, stop making it harder on yourself."

"Of course I don't like that bastard, but that's not why I wrote what I wrote. You have seen, Cersei's children. You have seen Cersei, you have seen Jaime. Those are his kids. Look, there's a book. I took it, it's in my room. Go and find it. Read it. Then, you'll believe me."

I wanted to believe him, but it was like he had a crazy look in his eye, as if he was going a little insane.

"Isabelle, please. Believe me."

"I want to."

He reached his hand through one of the gaps and tried to grab my hand. I allowed it and he held my hand tightly, and tears filled my eyes, it hurt me so much to see him in here, saying the most ridiculous things.

"I need you, to promise me something."

"Anything."

"No matter what happens. Weather it be to me, to the kingdom, to whomever or whatever, please. Protect Sansa and Arya. If King's Landing is to fall, take them back to Winterfell, I trust you to keep them safe." He paused and then, he took me by surprise with what he said next. "I know you care deeply for Sansa. The way you look at her, I know you love her."

"I..I..."

"You have loved her from the moment you became friends as small children, even if you didn't know it then, I know that you know it now."

I shook my head but Ned just laughed. "It's true."

"I slept with Cersei." I blurted out.

Ned released his grip on my hand and just stared at me in shock. He was confused. He was angry. I watched as he clenched his jaw and I gulped heavily. I just felt so much guilt inside of me for what happened, I just...I just had to get it out.

"You did what?" A broken voice said.

I turned my head to see Sansa stood there. I walked towards her but she walked backwards.

"Sansa, it just happened, I...I don't know how or why it happened but it just did."

"You slept with that...Bitch."

"Technically yes but also technically no, she did things to me, I didn't do things to her."

"So she fucked you and that still makes it all okay?"

"Yes. Wait no. No, wait, why do you even care?"

"Turn around and look who is inside a cell." Sansa said angrily. "Just leave." She said standing aside allowing me to pass. "Just go and stay away from me. You are no longer my knight."

"Sansa.."

"And you are no longer my best friend."

My heart broke but I didn't want to make this situation worse. I hated myself so much for this. I lowered my head and quickly walked out of the dungeon, leaving Sansa to be alone with her Father.

"You bitch." I heard a voice say but when I looked around, I saw no one.

I sighed and walked back to my room. So many emotions going through my body. Anger. Sadness. Hurt. Frustration. So much was happening so quick, I didn't know how to handle everything, it was like I was just making the worst choices.

I clenched and un-clenched  my fists as I walked down the corridor leading to my room. I counted the cracks in the ground as I walked, hoping it would somehow calm me down. I felt a presence in front of me as I got closer. Looking up, I saw Cersei leaning against the wall beside my door.

"May I talk to you?" She asked once I reached my room.

I didn't answer, I just opened the door and walked inside, not caring if she followed or not, but of course she did.

I closed my eyes and took a few deep breaths as she talked.

"What happened earlier, it was a surprise. I didn't plan on things happening like that but I just wanted you to believe me. To trust me. I could tell it was your first time for how your body reacted to some of the things I did...But as for Ned, I promise I will look further into this and he will be given a fair trial if things are to go that far. Sansa, Arya, even yourself, will not be punished, I will protect you all."

At this point, it just felt like she was saying any random bullshit in hopes she would make sense. Maybe she thinks I would tell people about what happened between us.

"Look...Isabelle, this isn't easy for me to admit. Especially so soon after my husband's death...But something happened to me, the day we met. Something I didn't think would ever happen...But there was just something that drew me to you. I didn't know it was true until I laid my eyes upon you."

Was she going to admit she was in love with me? I didn't want this. I didn't want her love. I didn't love her, Ned was right, it was Sansa that I loved...But now she hated me, but I know I will never stop loving her, no matter how hard I will try. We spent many years apart yet she was all I thought about.

I had loved her for many years and I would continue to do so.

I shook my head before Cersei could continue and did the one thing that I knew would stop her saying those dreaded words. "Stop talking." I said as I walked towards her. I gently cupped her face and kissed her lips.

Now it was my turn to do those things, it was time for one more bad choice, yet I knew I would secretly like this.