I had the biggest problem with my self with I was scared of commitment
Even though I was currently dating c/n,I loved him dearly and so did he,he knew about the issues and problems I went through he helped me through them.
Sometimes I feel like he is going to leave me or stop loving me which I feel like is completely normally in relationship but I thought about every single day and it was in my every thought about everything
We didn't use phrases like forever and when we live together because it would stay in my head and made me overthink and analyse it like would we even be together what if he leaves me or what if don't work.
I always got stressed about my feelings and problems I wondered if I bothered c/n with my issues but I loved him a lot and didn't want to lose him at all but you can't have always have what you want.
me and c/n were cuddling on the couch I just started to think as my mind started to wander to other places
I hugged c/n tightly he stroked my hair "you okay baby"he kissed my forehead "I'm scared"he sighed softly "come here"as he brought me even closer to him he hugged tight as we stayed like that for a bit.
He pulled away "let's talk"he spoke up I sat up looking at him giving him full eye contact "yeah we should"as felt my eyes become watery
He expression softer "hey don't cry"he moved closer he brought me onto his lap I wrapped my arms around his neck he placed kisses on my face
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This is cute
"I understand baby trust me every relationship has commitment issues every one has fear and so does every relationship that they you are able to be aware of the fact you commitment issues is amazing and I'm proud of you and you're able to acknowledge it,the fact we are discussing about it together and that you told me how you are feeling I know it's not easy but I know how hard you try baby"he smiled at me
I looked down he brushed my hair back and cupped my face gently
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I smiled emotionally
He gave me peck on lips "do you know or think of anything that could of giving you commitment issues"he looked at me patiently waiting for me to answer
I messed with my fingers "well um I did have divorced parents and I grew up seeing how dysfunctional they were and how they're were happy with it each other but how it all crashed down"c/n listened carefully to me
"I feel like the best thing for the both us to get through this together as a couple would to go to therapy as a pair if you comfortable with it"he looked at me with hope in his eyes
"yeah"I smiled "thank you c/n I love you so much"he kissed me "baby I love you too"
